This Awful Energy
by NotSoJollywood
Summary: It was simple: he was shrouded in darkness, and she in light. But when she discovers who she truly is, a new legacy is thrust upon her. Can Rey cope with the truth of her own past? Eventual Rey/Kylo.
1. Prologue

**This Awful Energy**

 **Summary** : It was simple: he was shrouded in darkness, and she in light. But when she discovers who she truly is, a new legacy is thrust upon her. Can Rey cope with the truth of her own past? Or will that dark birthright take control?

 **Author's Note** : Well, here is the prologue for _This Awful Energy,_ my newest Reylo fic! I am really excited about this one. I've even made a playlist for it to keep me inspired. Right now the rating is at T, but I may bump it up (down?) to an M later on. Not so much because of smut (sorry everyone) but because this fic may take a pretty dark turn. Consider this a warning for now. Also, since this is a prologue, it is going to be **very** short. But do not worry, after this the chapters will get longer!

As always, please tell me if you are interested in me continuing this story – I probably won't have enough energy to write if I get the sense that people aren't enjoying it. Please review and let me know what you think!

 **Chapter edited and re-uploaded 4/7/2018.**

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" _I am terrified by this dark thing_

 _That sleeps in me;_

 _All day I feel its soft, feathery turnings, its malignity."_

― Sylvia Plath

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 **Prologue**

 _15 A.B.Y. (11 years after the Battle of Endor)_

The night sky was a dark starless ebony — far too dark for her to make out the shape of her beloved brother only two feet in front of her. She could just barely make out the outline of Elix, standing directly at her side. But despite the poor visibility and hazards of travelling at night, their band continued to walk at a brisk and hurried pace. She continuously stumbled over rocks, tree branches, and other flora on the desolate, partially abandoned planet. She had pleaded with Varj to take rest, her limbs were heavy with exhaustion.

But her brother refused to stop their small company to rest until first light. The cover of darkness was needed, he haughtily explained, as there was always the striking possibility that their party was being watched. They had a destination to reach, and it was imperative that they reach it as soon as possible, despite the darkness and the frigid air. _It is far too cold on this foreign planet too_ , she thought to herself as she pulled the thick woolen black cloak tighter over her thin shoulders.

All of the suffering would all be worth it, she repeated the mantra that was her sole comfort on this forsaken planet, once the galaxy was restored to its former glory. _And I will sit at their right hand_ , she thought as a small smirk crawled onto her face. She could picture the grandeur of her new life now – the tapestries hung on her own imperial palace on Coruscant, the reverence and fear in everyone's eyes as they looked upon her and her so—

The fervent kick in her abdomen startled her from her thoughts of grandeur. A small yelp of pain escaped the back of her throat as she brought her hand up to caress her swollen stomach. She began to delicately rub the tender spot where the baby had kicked, as she softly cooed, "It is okay, little one _,_ we are almost there. We're almost at our new home."

"While you're at it," Elix chortled from beside her, "tell him not to come out until after we've reached the Disciples."

She was about to smirk at her brother's right hand man and give a witty reply to the man who had been her sole source of levity on their hazardous journey, but the gruff voice of her brother hissed from up ahead, "Will you two be quiet? We've not yet reached safety, and your joking may alert everyone to where we are."

"Dear brother," she whispered sardonically and rolled her eyes. She was grateful the darkness would mask her expression from her brother's wrath, "surely no one from the New Republic has followed us this far out. We are light years from the nearest inhabited world and it would be impossible for anyone to find—"

"Do you know what this planet used to be?" Her brother hissed, turning towards her with such a fervor that she had never seen before. "Moraband was once home to the great and powerful Sith. The New Republic will undoubtedly be watching this planet and the activity on it very closely from now on, sister. If you truly care about the son that you carry, and want to see him rule the galaxy one day, you will do all you can to keep the Republic away."

Her hands flew protectively over her swollen abdomen as her brother continued, "If they knew that this boy was raised by the Disciples of Ragnos, the power that this child will one day have, they will not hesitate to rip him from your arms and kill him."

She couldn't help the gape of her mouth and tears brimmed in her eyes at the thought of the son she had not had the chance to lay eyes on, being brutally torn from her arms and killed by the Republic. And all for what? The power that he would one day hold? The destiny that he would one day fulfill? Her hatred of the Republic, of everything it represented, only continued to boil. She looked to both her brother and Elix before she took a step forward on their march, "We must make it to the Disciples, then."

Their journey continued very much the same as it had since its conception —quiet and full of reverent reflection. Her thoughts were occupied by visions of her son, an unnamed boy that she had not yet seen in any of her dreams. But she could easily envision the power that he held, she could feel it growing inside of her even now. She could imagine him seated at the right hand of Marka Ragnos, ruling the galaxy and restoring the proper —true— balance to the Force. Her lips curled upward in pure joy at the thought.

As she distractedly pictured her unborn son and his unending power, she could feel her foot catch on something hard on the ground. She had seen the uprooted tree branch seconds too late, as her center of gravity disappeared out from underneath her. Letting out a desperate cry, she flung her arms across her swollen belly in an attempt to protect her unborn son from the devastation of the fall.

Her face contorted on its side as she braced herself for the inevitability of the impact.

But the inevitable did not come.

Her eyes went wide as she realized the falling sensation had stopped entirely, and that her face was still inches from the ground. She let out a sigh of relief as she was able to maneuver her hands underneath her, and steady herself enough into an upright position.

It was only then, after she was certain that both she and her son were unharmed, that she looked at her company. Multiple pairs of eyes were fixed on her, and she could easily see their unmistakably awed expression.

There was no confounding the pleasure in her brother's voice as he regarded her, "I can see you have been practicing. Good. You will need to hone your skills, sister."

She shook her head, frightened of what her brother would think, "That —that wasn't me."

Her brother eyed her carefully, "If you were not the one to use the Force, then who did?"

Almost immediately, her hand flew to her stomach. All eyes were now on her enlarged belly, as curious members of their company began to whisper excitedly. They had never truly seen her unborn son's power at work before.

But before she could pay any mind to their praises and wonder a sharp pain contracted in her abdomen, a more intense version of the kick from her child that she had felt only hours earlier. It was excoriating, worse than any pain she had endured before. Her eyes widened as the realization dawned on her — it had not been a kick that she felt.

She looked up to her brother and Elix, fear clouding her large brown eyes, "Varj – brother, the baby is coming."


	2. Lost in Anger

**This Awful Energy**

 **Summary** : It was simple: he was shrouded in darkness, and she in light. But when she discovers who she truly is, a new legacy is thrust upon her. Can Rey cope with the truth of her own past?

 **Author's Note** : Hey all you lovelies out there! I told you I would be back with another chapter today! I just want to note that part of this fic is going to be drawing from _Star Wars Legends_ as well as the new canon. That being said, some _Legends_ characters or groups were mentioned in the prologue. If you spotted them, let me know! Or, if you want to, go down the rabbit hole that is Wookiepedia and find out.

I also just want to thank Sheena Kushiashi for the review. I know I've said this before but your reviews really are what keep me going (especially through those horrible bouts of writer's block). So please let me know what you think! Your interest serves as my inspiration. Or, if you totally hate it, let me know why (but please do it nicely!) I am always trying to learn new things and improve. Also, special shout out to holepsi (holespsi . tumblr. com) for letting me use her amazing artwork as a cover image.

I also wanted to address something I said at the beginning of the prologue: this fic may get dark. When I say that, I mean were are going to get into people's heads a lot and those thoughts may not be pretty. If you want some more insight, look into the song that I borrowed inspiration from for this: Halsey's _Control._ I did not in any way shape or form mean that there would be self-harm, Stockholm Syndrome, or any sort of physical abuse. I hope that this clears it up for everyone!

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 **Chapter One: Lost in Anger**

 _35 A.B.Y._

The dense greenery on the rocky Ahch-To was something that Rey would never get used to. After all, having spent most of her life in the sandy wasteland of Jakku, the constant foliage was entirely foreign to her. The desert planet where she had spent the vast majority of her life was becoming more and more of a distant memory, an unpleasantly long chapter in her life that she now more than happy to turn the page from. This new planet, with its rocky hills and abundance of raw power, was becoming to feel more like home to her with every passing day. After all, having spent the last eight months training at the spot of the oldest Jedi temple in the galaxy, Rey finally felt as if she _belonged_ somewhere.

She was meant to be there.

Dipping her toes in the cool blue water that surrounded the island she was camped on, Rey slowly waded until she was waist deep and could easily start swimming. The planet consisted of a series of nearby island clusters, and she was determined to explore each of them during her time on the planet. Her master was more than happy to encourage her hobby, calling it an excellent exercise in discipline. It was true, getting to each island was no easy task – swimming long distances took both its mental and physical tolls on her. But Rey was glad to be able to explore the lush green world.

And in doing so, she had found her favorite spot.

A small island not too far from their main camp was the least rocky and most verdant of them all. A stony beach guarded the tall treats of the largest forest Rey had ever seen. She could easily spend hours wandering around the abundant woodlands. While the highest peak on the hillside of Luke's camp was indeed the most powerful spot on Ahch-To to meditate, her secluded forest enclosure was her own personal favorite.

Swimming to her favorite island was no longer a chore, as she found her excitement propelled her in the water. She glided through the waves with ease; her swimming skills had improved greatly from her first day of training. And as she reached the coast, she eagerly made her way to the center of the forest. As soon as her feet hit the forest floor, she felt instantaneously soothed by the trees that towered over her. Lowering herself into a comfortable position under a welcoming sapling, she closed her eyes.

Master Luke instructed his young padawan to meditate in an attempt to clear her mind. She was far too irrational, he noted, and lacked self-control. His words had hit her like a blow to the gut, but she was not one to argue with the Jedi Master.

And so she was to do as he instructed.

The greenery that enveloped Rey so warmly slowly pulled away from her until it had disappeared entirely. The sounds of the forest faded until there was nothing left. She was no one, and she was surrounded by nothing. And yet, everything – the entire galaxy - was at her finger tips. She could feel an electric pulse in her fingers, radiating through to her bones. She could feel the raw power of the island coursing through her veins. But she paid the galaxy no mind.

She was empty, free of the worries and fears that plagued her since she first left Jakku.

She was powerful, her skills with the Force growing stronger every day.

She was alone.

Until she wasn't.

The tiniest of ripples disturbed her serenity, alerting her to the fact that she was no longer alone in her meditation. Her breath quickened from its even pace, and she felt her shoulders tense in her trance-like state. And it was then that she feel the presence that loomed over her and caused her distress.

"Don't be afraid. I feel it to." The string of words echoed across her mind in the faintest of whispers. They had come from everywhere and nowhere at once. Rey's gut restricted and contorted itself into a knot as she processed the meaning of the words, and who had spoken them.

 _No, it couldn't be._

Rey's eyes sprang open, breaking her from the calming meditative trance. Her breathing was heavy, as if she had swam for miles. Running her fingers through her hair, Rey wondered how in the world Kylo Ren could have made his way in to her mind. Master Luke had told her how to keep him out, how to prevent him from fully reaching her. She could still sense him, his presence, from time to time. But she had been able to keep him, his voice, out of her head.

It had been a full two months since she heard Kylo Ren's voice.

Rey sighed, kicking the dirt beneath her in frustration. Looking up at her surroundings, she noticed that Ahch-To's sun was sinking low into the sky and darkness was beginning to envelop the forest. She frowned; it had been about midday when she reached the island itself. Having lost herself in meditation before, the shock had been nothing new to her. But she often felt relaxed and at peace after her sessions. But the only feelings that lingered now were agitation and unease.

Slowly, she made her way from the peaceful forest to the rocky beaches on her tiny island. In the dim light, she could just make out the island that she and Luke resided on. Swallowing hard, she waded into the water before swimming at full force, wanting to reach their campsite before sundown. She did not need the sunlight; she could easily find her way home – it was like instinct to her now. But that night she simply did not possess the energy it would take to use all of her senses and find her way back under the cover of night.

Kylo Ren had stolen that from her.

After a swim that felt like an eternity, Rey finally reached the island that Luke Skywalker called home for more than a decade. It was quickly becoming her home too, and she could easily have remained on Ahch-To for the rest of her life. But a gnawing feeling deep inside of her gut told her that something – or someone – was going to make sure that it did not happen. As she wearily trudged up the rocky cliffs, her mind wandered back to her vision. Or rather, her lack of one.

Kylo Ren was the figure that haunted her dreams since that first evening on Starkiller Base. Before she had advanced in her training, she would see him almost every single night in her dreams. He would call to her, making promises that tempted her so. He promised her power, he promised her a purpose. Months later, his words still echoed in her mind. _I will help you find who you are looking for._

Even now, his words echoed in her head, tempting her. Rey shook her head, hoping to banish the unwelcome thought. A surge of anger boiled up inside of her – anger directed towards herself. _You should not have let him get inside your head,_ she chastised herself as she finally reached the dilapidated hut that she and Master Luke called home. Her anger had not yet dissipated when she reached the tiny structure. Perhaps her master was right. Perhaps she did need more self-control.

She bristled at the thought that he could be right about that.

As she walked in, she could see her master stirring an odorless gray mush over the hearth. Before he could notice her expression, her face wrinkled up at the thought of eating it. Her stomach, however, disagreed as it let out a vicious groan of hunger. Her master did not turn around as he addressed her, "Did you have a long and trying day?"

Rey collapsed onto a makeshift bed that had been assembled for her in the corner of the hut, "You could say that, Master."

Out of the corner of her eye, Rey watched as Luke scooped a small wooden bowl into the pot of mush, filling it. He handed it to her, and she took it greedily. Rey was well aware that her master was eyeing her as she wolfed downed the meal – but she did not care. She was hungry, and never before had to worry about what others thought of her eating habits. But the staring did not stop once she had finished licking the contents of the wooden bowl clean; Rey shifted on her mattress uncomfortably.

"You felt him again, didn't you?"

The words echoed for a moment, hanging mercilessly in the stale night air of Ahch-To. Rey swallowed, but nodded. There was no use in lying to her master – he would know the truth anyway.

"Today was the first – the first day in a long time that I heard his voice." Rey stumbled over her words, unsure if she could clearly articulate what she had been feeling, "But there are other times when I – I can feel him. I know when he's angry, I can feel it deep in my bones. I can feel it when he is elated, when something goes right for him."

"What do you mean?" Her master was staring at her more intently than he ever had before. Rey shifted uncomfortably under his gaze.

"It is as if he never truly goes away," Rey shook her head, disgusted with herself, "Ever since he tried to get inside my head. I can feel him sometimes – not speak to him, but feel his emotions. No matter what I do – even with what you taught me, I cannot seem to prevent it."

Luke Skywalker blinked slowly, his lips pursed together – a sure sign of his deep thought. The two sat in silence for what felt to Rey like an eternity. But finally, her master spoke up, "Have you ever heard of the term 'force-bond'?"

Rey shook her head; her experience learning the less practical knowledge of the Jedi had been somewhat lacking. Her master seemed to sense this, and nodded before continuing, "A force-bond is a connection between two Force-sensitive beings. Everything you have just described to me are symptoms of such a bond."

Rey's mouth fell open, she could not help but feel absolutely horrified by the words. How could she be possibly connected to the horrible creature who had brutally murdered his own father? A knot twisted deep in the pit of her stomach at the mere thought of it. But at the same time, every cell in her body felt her master's words to be true. She was connected to Kylo Ren somehow. Rey hesitated for a moment, "If this is true, what – hat can I do to stop it?"

There was no mistaking the look of pity etched onto Luke Skywalker's face, "To sever a force-bond, no matter how undesired it may be, would cause irreparable damage to both you and him. You would have to turn away entirely from the Force – from who you are."

The knot in Rey's stomach twisted even tighter at the thought of what she had to do. Using the Force, training and seeing her power grow finally gave her a sense of purpose in her life. Could she really turn away from all of that? Luke seemed to sense her thoughts as he quickly added, "To be bonded to someone is not a light matter. It is a part of you, and will remain so. But it does not have to control you. You can control it."

"How?" Her words came out as a dry croak.

Luke Skywalker eyed his padawan carefully, "It will take more than physical strength. To control this bond, to make sure he does not hold sway over or tempt you, you will have to train your thoughts and emotions. Already you are too impulsive – control over your thoughts and emotions will mean that he does not have access to them."

Rey nodded, already having been chided by her master for a lack of self-control. Her impulsiveness and anger felt natural to her, a trait that could never be fully suppressed. Idly, Rey thought to her parents and wondered if she had perhaps inherited their temperament. But she would never know, and could only seek to control it now. Her master seemed to notice that her thoughts drifted, because he looked at her harshly, "While it is not ideal that you and he share such a connection, perhaps, if you master your own self-control, it is something that could be used for both yours and the Resistance's benefit."

Without another word, her master turned to leave his padawan with her thoughts. Rey's emotions were running high as she thought of everything that her master relayed to. She could not doubt that she was connected in some way to Kylo Ren. But she had to wonder if that connection could even be considered a good thing.

She was still thinking about him as she closed her eyes and drifted off in to sleep.

When her eyes opened, the planet was engulfed in complete darkness. Rey could not make out the foliage that was mere feet in front of her. Even the natural light of the planet's moon was shrowded by impenetrable darkness. She frowned as she realized then that something sinister clouded the air. She could not place her finger on it, however. But something was different. Something was horribly _wrong_. It took her a moment for the realization to hit her: she was no longer on Ahch-To. The planet that had been home to the first Jedi Temple gave her the exact opposite feeling as this one did.

And yet, she could sense something almost _familiar_ about this strange new world.

She walked along the path laid out before her on this strange planet, unsure of where it would lead her. But there was something, something that she could not place, that told her she had been to this planet before. _No,_ she chided herself, _you are just dreaming._

But Rey didn't know if she could just dream anymore.

In the distance, as her eyes adjusted to the darkness of the planet, Rey could just make out what appeared to be the ruins of a once great temple. Almost as if by her own instinct, her feet began to carry her in the direction of the building. It brought a sense of comfort to her, almost as if she had been meant to be there from the beginning. She frowned at the thought, wondering how she could feel so at peace on such a sinister planet. As she continued walking, she took in all the sights and sounds of the planet. Small insects could be heard making strange noises in the distance, providing a beautiful symphony as she explored.

Rey must have walked two miles before she found it. In the darkness, she could see the remnants of some makeshift settlement. Fabric hung from tree tops, and the remains of an old fire pit directed her to the center of the settlement. Rey swallowed hard as she closely examined what lay before her. Every day tools for cooking and cleaning were scattered all over. A small droid, rusted and nonfunctioning from years of disuse lay slumped against a tree trunk. Rey's heart tugged as she thought of who could possibly live in such a place.

Out of the corner of her eye, she could see the outline of a small human-like figurine. Something pulled her towards the tiny doll, and as she scooped it up into her hand she brought it straight to her chest. In doing so she could not help but feel an odd sense of comfort at the action. The feeling disturbed her slightly, but she did not have time to dwell on it. Immediately, she could feel something – s _omeone_ – approaching her spot at the camp site.

How Rey had not felt his presence on the planet earlier, she did not know. The planet was so shrouded in darkness that it masked his own until he was right upon her. When she finally looked up to face him, it surprised her that she could clearly see his features without the absence of any light. The hook in his nose, the dark flowing mane of hair, the scar that she had given him. He stood before her now, there was no denying it. Rey took a step back from him, the fear in her rising up as she dropped the doll where she stood. What could he be possibly be doing on this planet? Did he feel the same connection to it that she did? The questions were swirling around in her head, and it was enough to make her completely dizzy.

"You need a teacher," The words came from his lips as a whisper, but they seemed to echo across the campsite. The sound sent chills reverberating through Rey's spine as she struggled to move away from him even further. But all of her attempts were futile – as she attempted to lift her legs to retreat, she wobbled as she noticed they were firmly planted on the ground. She lifted her legs again in another attempt, and it took all her strength not to fall backward when she failed miserably at moving. It was almost as though her own legs did not want her to move. She was physically stuck at that exact spot, and Kylo Ren took yet another step closer.

Rey fervently shook her head at his words, beads of sweat forming on her forehead as she struggled to free herself, "I do not need you."

He took a step closer, reaching out his ungloved hand toward her. Rey turned her cheek, refusing to look at the haunting creature before her. She struggled once more as he moved even closer. But it did not matter, his hand grazed upon her cheek. Her pale cheek grew hot underneath his touch, and she flinched away from him. Her teeth grinded together as she hissed, "Stop."

His hand retreated almost instantaneously as she repeated the words, "I do not need you."

When she looked up again, he was gone.

Almost immediately, she could feel his absence all around. Except under her still flushed cheek; she reached up to touch the spot where his own hand grazed. She pulled away almost instantaneously, as if the touch had burned her. Her hands clenched in tight fists – how could she have let him affect her so?

Rey opened her eyes, greeted by the bright sunlight and chirping birds of Ahch-To. It took her more than a few moments to register where she was and that she was no longer trapped in her dream. Her brow furrowed as she tried to make sense of the events that unfolded as she slept. It was the first time in a long while that she had physically seen Kylo Ren. Now aware of the bond between the two of them, she was still disgusted but no longer shocked. But the part that confused her the most was the planet.

What was that place?

Why did it seem so eerily familiar to her?

Rey swallowed, contemplating if she should tell her master about her vision. Of course, Luke Skywalker would know what to do, tell her how to begin to make sense of such a situation. She bit her lip; her master would also chide her for not maintaining control of herself and her own emotions. It made her susceptible to manipulation, he often said. He would say no different now and chastise her for being so easily manipulated by the enemy.

He was better off not knowing.

She would have to continue about her day as though no vision had appeared to her the night before. She stood up from the makeshift mattress, swinging her body until her lower back grudgingly cracked from the movement. It was not the most comfortable of bedding, but it taught her humility and submission.

Or so she had been told by her master.

Without another thought, Rey grabbed an Almarkian apple from the basket her master kept on the window and went off to begin her day's training. As she walked to the spot she met Luke Skywalker daily, she had to assume that he would train her harder than he ever had in the past, based off of their conversation the previous night.

And Rey was right. When she found Luke Skywalker waiting on the makeshift training grounds for her, she could see the intensity and determination in his eyes. She had never seen the older man so intense; it momentarily disarmed her. So much so that she barely noticed him throwing the practice staff to her; she caught it just before it would have hit her square in the jaw. Her eyes widened at the intensity of the practice so early in the morning, but she dared not question her master. Fixing her posture into a defensive stance, she prepared herself for her master to attack her. But the attack never came; Luke Skywalker mirrored her own defensive posture and waiting for her to move onto the offensive. Rey happily obliged, bringing the weighted training staff up over her head as she charged at him.

He maneuvered around her attack with unparalleled grace, bringing his own staff up to meet hers. The impact of the two weapons colliding was enough to make her muscles ache. Rey let out a small grunt as she pushed him away with full force; he stumbled backward momentarily to regain his footing, leaving Rey the opportunity to bring her staff down on him again. She swung her weapon, this time below his knees. She had hoped to get him on the ground, overpowering him for good. But he sensed her movements and was able to jump high over her swinging weapon as she unleashed it on him.

Her brow furrowed as she contemplated her next move. If she attacked once again from the front, her master would call her predictable. But she had not yet mastered propelling herself into the air – something she would need to do for a successful airborne attack. In the moments that Rey was devising her plan, she had only just barely noticed the gray haired Jedi lunging toward her and bringing his weapon with him. She had been too distracted to notice him there, and it was too late for her to make any decisive defensive moves. She could feel the fea

And so she did the only thing she could think of.

Closing her eyes and positioning her hands square in front of her chest, Rey blocked him from coming anywhere near her. She waited for the impact of his staff, but it never came. Rey opened her eyes to see Luke paused in the air before her, as if frozen by a shield. Her mouth dropped open as she saw it, breaking her concentration.

Luke Skywalker moved freely at that point, retreating a few steps backwards as he regained his composure. He eyed Rey curiously for a moment; she nervously shifted under his scrutinizing gaze. He tilted his head as he regarded her carefully, "I have never seen you do that before, Rey."

She swallowed, unsure if she wanted to meet his gaze with her own, "I – I have never done that before. The idea of trying it just came to me – and I was able to do it."

He pursed his lips together, waiting momentarily before responding, "You have shown a great amount of skill here, Rey. But I would like to see you learn how to control it. Master it, do not let it be the master of you."

Rey nodded, her cheeks flushing under the admonishment.

"I would like to see you repeat the skill," Luke Skywalker continued, as he gathered his staff from its discarded position on the floor. "Repeat it until you can do it on command each time."

Her brow furrowed in indignation at her master's words; she had been able to complete the skill at the height of her emotions. Perhaps total control was not what she needed. But she nodded and regained her composure; she did not dare argue with him over such matters. When her master charged at her, she was ready. She dipped and swung with such grace in order to deflect his swings at her. She retaliated against him with full force, using all of the strength in her throbbing arms in a vain attempt to disarm him. Every instinct in her body was telling her to lash out at him, punish him for criticizing her abilities. But she did as Luke Skywalker instructed, keeping her temper level as she fought back.

When he lunged at her one final time, she attempted to block him – this time with her mind. As he came barreling toward her, she imagined the same shield around her, protecting her from her assailant.

And Luke's weapon came hard down on her anyway, hitting her hard right in the shoulder. Rey let out a yelp of pain as she clutched the point of impact. There was no doubt the throbbing spot on her shoulder would leave a dark bruise. She shot him an indignant look as she rubbed it gently. Her master, however, looked down at his young padawan calmly, "You were rash, undisciplined in your movements."

"I was trying to keep myself _controlled,_ " Rey hissed through the pain of her throbbing shoulder. "My emotions – my fear of being attacked – are what keep me going. They are what give me my skill. I'm no good without them."

"That is not the way of the Jedi," Luke shook his head, looking sadly at his trainee, "There is no emotion, there is peace. There is no ignorance, there is knowledge. There is no passion, there is-"

"Serenity," Rey snapped, "I know the code well enough – you won't let me forget it. But I'm stronger when I use my emotions, when I let them in. Using them is how I can do things."

"It is not the Jedi way," Luke repeated, keeping his eyes locked on her.

"Well maybe," Rey hissed through her gritted teeth, unable to mask her seething tone, "The way of the Jedi is wrong. It's no wonder there aren't any of them left."

As soon as the words slipped out of her mouth, Rey instantly regretted them. While she had not been told the full history of Luke's Jedi Academy, she could put together the pieces that she did know. The look etched upon her mentor's face stung Rey worse than any blaster shot. "I-I am so sorry. I did not mean that,"

A small sigh escaped her mentor, as he walked towards a small patch of rocks that overlooked the cliff's edge. With a wave of his hand, he motioned for his padawan to follow him. As she positioned herself on the rock next to Luke, Rey could feel the shame bubbling up inside of her. Would he yell at her? Would he decide to stop training her? Luke Skywalker inhaled sharply before setting his eyes on Rey, "I was around the same age as you are now when the great Master Yoda continued my training on Degobah. I, too, grew frustrated when I did not take to a task so easily, or was forced to do things differently."

Rey regarded her master, trying to imagine him as the fabled young Rebellion pilot who used the Force to take down the Galactic Empire. She struggled to picture him as rash and impulsive.

"It may take years, sometimes even decades, for someone to master the art of serenity in the face of conflict, to use peace instead of anger as fuel."

Rey was silent for a moment, considering his words. She swallowed, unsure of herself as she finally spoke up, "Is that why the Jedi of the past began training at such a young age?"

Luke nodded but did not meet Rey's inquisitive gaze, "The younger that a child is when they begin their training, the easier it is to quell those thoughts and feelings of anger. The older a padawan is when they begin – those seeds have already been planted." The legendary Jedi looked out at the water sadly, as if there was something greater on his mind.

 _He must be thinking about his former padawan,_ Rey told herself. She looked up to Luke, "Is that what happened? To Kylo Ren?"

He inhaled, taking a long pause before answering her question. "My padawan was young when he began to train with me. The Dark Side can tempt everyone – young and old alike."

 _Is that what you are worried about with me?_ Rey thought, but she dared not ask the question out loud. A gnawing feeling at the very bottom of her stomach made her unsure if she wanted to know his true answer to that question. Luke stood up from his position overlooking the cliff face, retreating back into the tranquility of his hut and leaving Rey alone with her thoughts.

Whether Rey liked it or not, she was bonded to Kylo Ren. She could feel his own emotions and project her own on to him. She had a connection with him that could never truly be severed. Rey swallowed; would that make her more likely to join the Dark Side? She shook her head, trying to banish the thought entirely from her mind. After all, she had been tempted by the Dark Side on Starkiller Base and won.

Had she not?

* * *

 **Author's Note:** Okay, so here is the first official chapter. Please please please let me know what you think of this! As I said, I'm really excited about where this is going but I don't know if I should continue. Please review and let me know!


	3. The Path to the Dark Side

**This Awful Energy**

 **Summary** : It was simple: he was shrouded in darkness, and she in light. But when she discovers who she truly is, a new legacy is thrust upon her. Can Rey cope with the truth of her own past?

 **Author's Note** : Thank you all for the amazing feedback everyone! I'm super excited for this story and I'm glad that you all feel the same about it. I do apologize for not updating sooner. But school has started, and between lesson plans, grading and supervising the Key Club, I have barely had time for the boyfriend and writing. But I have definitely not given up on any of my stories.

That being said, I am not going to update This Awful Energy until I finish Balance. I have one chapter to go, and if you read that s well – don't worry, I don't plan on leaving you hanging!

As a note, the song Rey sings does not belong to me. It is adapted from J.R.R. Tolkien's Song of New Hope. Yes, I do see the irony there.

* * *

 **Chapter Two: The Path to the Dark Side**

Rey chewed her bottom lip thoughtfully as she gazed out to all of the wondrous green and blue beauty that Ahch-To had to offer. The sun was barely rising in the sky and the cool morning air gently kissed her cheeks. It truly was a magical place, and her connection to the power that ran deep beneath the trees and sandy beaches continued to grow with each passing day. She drew her strength from the series of islands that had helped generations of Jedi before her. But yet, it was still not enough. Rey's shoulders collapsed as she sighed in frustration; Rey could feel her potential – the power she was supposed to possess. And yet, she had not been able to reach it. While the island's own connection to the Force helped, she knew that she was meant for more. Something was standing in her way, something that the raw power of the island could not – or _would not_ – help her with.

Her frustration mounted as she once again peered at the lush greenery. The place had once easily held a special place in her heart – a bond forged by the connection to her every growing power. But now, it seemed that that very bond was slowly waning. The new, dark planet whose name she did not know was calling to her, tempting Rey with its own raw power. In her dreams, she could almost taste the power that this foreign world could give her. Wherever the planet was, it wanted her to be there. It wanted her to leave Ahch-To. It wanted to help guide her. To help her reach her full potential.

Rey swallowed as the sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach grew all consuming. Her time on Ahch-To was coming to an end. She did not know _when,_ she did not know how, but deep in every fiber of her being, Rey knew that she would have to leave the comfort of her new home soon. Whether she chose to find this new sinister planet or not.

If she was being quite honest with herself, the thought of leaving absolutely terrified her. Her universe had grown exponentially in the few shorts months since she had fled Jakku on that old piece of junk with BB-8 and Finn in tow. She met new people, secured her own place in the Resistance, and had become the padawan of the legendary Luke Skywalker. Since that moment she rescued the little droid on the barren desert of Jakku, she had not been truly alone. The thought of leaving all that, returning to the solitude that had consumed her childhood, sent chills of terror running through her spine.

 _Truly hone your power, discover who you really are, and you will never be lonely again._

Rey gasped as the thought slithered its way into her head. She had no idea where it had come from. But the thought of knowing where she had come from, where she truly belonged, tugged at her like a young child in need of constant attention. Perhaps this hidden planet held the key to discovering her own place in the universe.

Perhaps….

Rey shook her head, violently pushing the thought out of her mind. All of those thoughts, all of the temptations, were absolutely _insane._ Her previous conversation with her master flooded her mind – temptation was the path to the dark side. Rey was not dark; she could not be. She fought Kylo Ren on Starkiller. He had extended his hand, offering her a place as his own padawan. And she had rejected him. She had rejected the dark. And so why was it still calling to her?

Or, perhaps, it was not that dark side that had tempted her so… Perhaps there was something else besides light and dark. Perhaps that was what was calling to her. Perhaps that was where she belonged. Rey swallowed as she considered her thoughts, self-doubt slithering into her mind like a serpent ready to strike at any moment. Her uncertainty frightened her; Rey preferred to deal in absolutes. Right and wrong. Light and dark. Not knowing her place in the universe terrified her.

But she could not tell Luke of her fears. Her master would not understand; he always knew where he stood, his own place in the galaxy. The line in the desert sand must have been clearly drawn for him. Knowing where his place was, where he had come from must have been such a comfort to him. Rey shook her head, banishing all of the unpleasant thoughts from her mind.

There were plenty of things that she just could not confide in her master about.

She shuddered involuntarily as the memory of the figure who haunted her dreams crept into her thoughts. Once again, _he_ had made an appearance in her dreams. Her bond with the dark knight seemed to make those dreams all the more _potent_. And that frightened her. She shuddered as she recalled the look his dark eyes gave her, seeing into her soul as he haunted her nightmares. She cringed as she remembered how is dark locks had fallen over his face, casting an alluring shadow over his features as he whispered in her ear.

 _Come to me. I can be your teacher._

Rey swallowed hard, recalling how the feeling of his breath on her neck had sent shivers cascading down her spine. Her cheeks grew hot just thinking about it again.

No, she could not tell Luke Skywalker about all that.

While her master had been a social recluse for the better part of a decade, he was certainly not blind. He could read Rey fairly easily; he would know she had another dream about Kylo Ren almost immediately. And Rey could not bear another lecture about the importance of _control_ for another moment longer. She could already hear the speech in her mind, and she rolled her eyes.

Luke would never be able to comprehend her situation; he would never know how difficult it would be to fully get Kylo Ren out of her head. And yet, Rey still tried. As she looked out to the rocky islands of Ahch-To, she began to wade gently into the water. Immediately, a sense of calm determination washed over her – banishing all unpleasant thoughts from her mind.

Rey began to swim. She glided through the water with relative ease, surprised at how calming the exercise actually was. With each stroke, her worries seemed to pull further and further away from her. She maneuvered through the water with more grace than she was accustomed to. She moved quickly, the tiny island that she called home grew smaller on the horizon line until it was nothing but a little spec.

She swam until her arms could no longer carry her. As she finally grew tired from the exercise, she turned on her back and began to float. The water carried her along, gently lapping at her cheeks as she stared upwards. It hardly rained on Ahch-To, and that particular morning was no exception. The clouds in the sky were small and benign, unable to threaten a single drop. From her spot floating in the water, Rey smiled.

It was perhaps one of the first times she had felt truly relaxed in a long while. She closed her eyes, allowing herself to drift peacefully in the water. In her own tranquility, a soft hum escape Rey's lips. She could not name the tune, but it felt so familiar to her all the same. Before she could even stop herself, Rey began to sing:

" _Out of doubt, out of dark, to the moon's rising  
he rode singing in the night, glory unleashing.  
Hope he rekindled, and in hope ended;  
over death, over dread, over doom lifted  
out of loss, out of life, unto long glory." _

She did not know where the words had come from, nor their meaning. But she smiled as she sang the tune, feeling a foreign feeling of comfort wash over her as she did so. She could not tell how long she allowed herself to float aimlessly in the water. But she saw that the sun had moved considerably from its original place in the sky. As she maneuvered herself into an upright position, she spotted land relatively close to her. She began to propel herself through the water, swimming in order to reach her rocky destination.

But Rey never reached the shore line. Each passing stroke brought her closer and closer to a series of darkened caves that guarded the sandy shores. As she reached the first of many grottos, Rey hesitated briefly. Uncertainty tugged at her, willing her to turn back where she had come from.

But curiosity got the best of Rey, as it always did.

Holding her breath, Rey propelled herself into darkened cave. With each passing stroke, it became more and more difficult for her to see as cave blocked all natural light. She shuddered at the eeriness of the grotto, at the loud echo of ever miniscule movement she made in the water.

It was a relief when Rey found that the water was shallow enough for her to stand.

She could easily walk along the cave line, her fingers tracing each bump and groove in the rock face. It helped her to keep her sense of direction in the darkness. Her eyes had adjusted somewhat, but the absence of most light still hindered her.

It was then that her finger suddenly hit a crude groove in the cave wall. And then another. And another. Rey paused for a moment, as her eyes narrowed and tried to focus on the cave wall. Through the darkness, she could see small hatch marks carved in to the stone. A variety of shapes carved into the wall, forming a series of pictures. It was a language that Rey could not understand, despite her having learned a great deal of different dialects at Nima Outpost.

It was an ancient language.

She regarded the pictographs for a few moments longer, trying her hardest to make sense of the writing before her. She brought her fingers to the etching, gently tracing her fingers over the crude markings.

It was then that Rey felt herself being pulled, away from the cave, away from Ahch-To, and straight into the unknown.

* * *

 _Rey's eyes opened, her head pounding from both the ferocity in which she had been pulled and the confusion of the sudden change. What had happened to her? Where was she?_ When _was she?_

 _It took only mere moments before she could answer at least one of those questions. Instantaneously, the aura of the atmosphere provided a sense of welcome and comfort to her – like a newborn being swaddled in a blanket for the first time. She was on the planet from her nightma- dreams. Her eyes went wide at the realization, as she eagerly took in all of her surroundings._

 _She began to wander, her feet seemingly moving of their own volition. Rey drank in all the sights of this hauntingly familiar planet, hoping that something –_ anything – _would help to trigger an actual memory. Somewhere, in the distance, Rey could hear voices. A small chorus of laughter. Instinctively, Rey made her way towards the noise._

 _Suddenly, she felt the same pull again, although this time not as violent. As she came to, the scenery on the planet had changed. Night had fallen, and she noticed what appeared to be a hurriedly put together camp. Somewhere, from inside one of the makeshift tents, she could hear a woman's ear piercing scream. Rey hurried towards the source, making no attempts at resisting the gnawing need to find this woman._

 _She was not the only one who scurried towards the sound. Throngs of people, all disheveled and dusty, flocked towards the tent in the center of the camp. Rey shuddered as she noticed the people; she could sense the darkness in some of them._

 _But she followed them nonetheless, desperate to find the woman. She could not put her finger on why – but Rey_ had _to find her. As she made her way to the tent that people seemed to hover around, she noticed a man standing guard at the entrance of the tent. Like the others around him, Rey could sense the unyielding darkness that radiated off of him. But there was something else about him, something Rey could not quite put her finger on._

 _He was addressing the crowd, but Rey did not hear a word that he spoke. All that she saw, all that she could focus on, was what stood behind him. As he moved directly away from the tent to speak to the growing crowd at his feet, Rey scurried behind him. She pulled back the tent flap –_

 _Once again, Rey felt herself being pulled._ No! _She thought as she fought the forces that had so callously pulled her away from the tent. But the Force was much stronger than she, and there was no use fighting against it. The scene around her changed once again, and daylight graced the still unknown planet._

 _In the distance, high pitched laughter chimed through the trees. Once again, Rey made her way to the source of the sound._

 _Her foot caught on something, causing her to fall forward onto the hard ground. With a groan, Rey looked to see what had caused her fall. A small, human-like doll. Her eyes narrowed as she picked up the figurine and caressed it gently. It was the same one from her vision of Kylo Ren. Rey swallowed as an uneasy feeling washed over her completely._

 _More laughter in the distance broke Rey from her thoughts. She dropped the doll as if it had caught fire, not wanting to even consider Kylo Ren as she sought to make her way through the planet. But almost as soon as she returned to her task, Rey was once again falling._

* * *

Rey panted as she opened her eyes, for the briefest of moments hoping that she would still be in the midst of her vision. How could it end just like that? What was it all supposed to mean? Rey wanted nothing more than to remain in the world of his vision. But much to her chagrin, as her eyes adjusted to the darkness, she soon noticed that she was once again in the grotto on Ahch-To. But Rey was forced to ignore the throbbing pang of grief in her chest at the loss. There were more pressing matters to attend to: the water level had risen quite a bit, and she struggled to remain standing while keeping her head above water. She had been out of it for so long that the tides had begun to change.

With one last, longing look at the runes on the cave wall that had triggered such an intense vision, Rey turned to make her way out of the grotto. As she moved to propel herself forward, however, something seemed to keep her right foot from moving. She attempted to pull yet again, but it seemed that a portion of her legging was caught underneath the water. She struggled yet again, it was as if whatever her legging had been caught on had a death grip.

The water level continued to rise as Rey struggled with her legging. "Son of a bantha," She murmured to herself. But as she did so, her mouth began to fill with salt water. Gasping for a breath air, Rey submerged herself in the water. Opening her eyes under the surface, she searched for whatever could have so tightly snagged her clothing.

It did not take long for her eyes to land on the rock that had pinned a part of her clothing to the grotto floor. Summoning all of her strength, she pushed the rock. But the heavy stone did not budge. Her chest grew tight as the breath she was holding threatened to burst out of her. She stood up, her head barely emerging from the water. Through her nose, she was able to suck in the last of the air as the rising tide filled the grotto.

Rey submerged herself again, immediately trying to remove the rock. But the weight would not budge.

 _Come on._ Rey told herself, c _oncentrate._ She closed her eyes, focusing all of her energy and concentration on moving the rock in front of her. She pushed the heavy stone once again, feeling the weight give slightly. But the shift was not enough for her to free her trapped leg. She closed her eyes again, willing the energy around her to help her. With a final, forceful push, Rey summoned all of her energy. The rock moved a few inches, enough for her to pull away easily.

Frantically, she began to swim to the grotto's entrance. Her chest was beginning to feel tight once again as her need for oxygen became much more dominant. She propelled herself faster than she had ever swam before. When she finally cleared the cave's entrance, she gasped for air. Her lungs filled with so much oxygen that they burned when she finally released her breath.

Her heart was hammering, adrenaline coursing through her veins. She took a moment, attempting to relax herself and catch her breath before she swam back to her base camp. The sun had risen high in the sky, and she needed to return to her master before he grew worried about her. She swallowed hard, wondering as she began to gently paddle away from the grotto just how much she should reveal to Luke Skywalker. What she had seen made no sense to her, and Luke would be able to help.

And yet, there was something about her vision that had felt so deeply personal – she did not want to share it.

Rey began to paddle; at least she had the entire swim back to decide.

Rey was still drenched when she finally reached her master's homestead on the main island. It was the early afternoon, and she had lost much of her morning to the grotto. Rey knew she was late for her daily training with Luke; she could only hope her master would not be too harsh on her. She opened the rickety door, hoping to silently enter the homestead. But the constant dropping of water from her clothing and hair gave her away with each _squish._

"You were up very early this morning," A voice came from behind her. Rey whirled around, her wet hair whipping her in the face as she did so. Her master stood at the hearth behind her, she had been so preoccupied with entering silently that she did not even notice him standing there. Luke regarded her skeptically, his well-trained eyes boring deep into her.

Rey shuffled her feet, looking down so she did not meet his gaze. "I could not sleep."

"Ah," Her master looked at her curiously. Rey tried to sense what he was thinking, but he remained neutral in both expression and mind. Despite all indications otherwise, she could not shake the feeling that Luke Skywalker was judging her. Without another word, her master turned back towards the makeshift hearth in the homestead. Over a dimly lit fire was a pot of boiling water. Luke stirred the pot gently before adding something that Rey did not recognize to it. "Go and dry yourself. We will begin your training later this afternoon."

Rey did as she was commanded. But even as she changed into much more comfortable and dry training clothes, her thoughts continued to wander back towards the vision that she had earlier that day. Did her master know what she had seen? Could he sense that she was keeping something from him? She did not know, but she could only hope.

When she reappeared fully dry, her master was pouring the boiling water into two small mugs. Rey inhaled the calming aroma of chamomile. As she walked over, Luke handed her a steaming cup of the freshly made tea. She took it gladly. As the brought the steaming cup to her lip, her master regarded her, "Perhaps the reason that you are unable to sleep soundly in the night is because of your force bond."

Rey paused, the cup of tea still at her lips. Already, she could feel the anger boiling up inside of her. It took every ounce of control in her body not to visibly react to her master's words. Instead, she raised her eyebrows, waiting for him to continue.

"Perhaps it is better that we spend today practicing both meditation and control." Luke eyed her, "Having a well-disciplined mind may help to calm your nightmares."

In an involuntary motion, her eyes rolled upwards at her master's suggestion. Luke Skywalker started at her for a moment, and Rey braced herself for a vicious scolding. But it never came; her master chose to disregard her own ignorance. Instead, he took a small sip of his own tea before saying, "I am afraid from here on in, your training will have to be more intense."

Her lips curled upward in a smile and all previous anger and resentment that she felt towards her master dissipated almost immediately. Perhaps now she would learn more about what it _really_ meant to be a Jedi, rather than just practicing asceticism and meditation.

"I am sensing that, very soon, our time on Ahch-To will end." Luke continued as he finished the tea. "It will be best that you are prepared for whatever may come your way."

Rey raised her brows, attempting to appear surprised by the news. She had the same feeling; she had for days now. But she could not help but shake the feeling that her path would be a different one that Luke Skywalker's. She had to wonder if Luke felt it to, but she did not dare bring it up. It would only lead to another lecture about discipline and following the way of the Jedi. As she finished her last sip of the chamomile tea, she looked to her master, "What do you think will happen next?"

"That, I cannot see." Her master sounded as if he almost regretted the words, "There has been no word from the Resistance on the holo-pad that Chewbacca gave us before he returned to Leia. But, nevertheless, we will have to work just as hard to make sure that you are ready whenever that time comes."

Rey set the cup of tea down, her thoughts wandering to the beleaguered Resistance. She thought back on her friends, on Finn and BB-8. All of them seemed worlds away, so far removed from her and everything she had accomplished in the past few months. She thought of what Luke had said, the possibility of returning to the Resistance and life there.

Could she do it?

"If we do go back, Master, things would not be the same, would they?" The words that had come out of her mouth were less of a question and more of an observation. The gnawing feeling deep in her gut every time she thought of the Resistance was enough of an answer for her.

Luke Skywalker shook his head, "No, I do not believe that they would. When my father was a padawan, the Jedi were revered and used for their counsel and wisdom precisely because they were personally removed from situations. I fear that the rise of the First Order, this fight has become far too personal. We will both have to be very careful not to mix our own personal feelings with the goals of the Resistance."

Rey's cheeks flushed at her master's mentions of her own personal feelings.

"Is that why the Jedi cut off all contact with their families?" Rey ignored her master's comments as she considered the position of the Jedi. "To prevent them from seeing things too personally?"

"The Jedi did not want their personal ties to complicate matters." Luke eyed Rey carefully, "Personal connections, familial ties – they can lead to irrational fear. Fear that loved ones will be put in danger. Fear for their lives. My old mentor once told me that fear is the path to the dark side, and the Jedi must stand firmly on the side of the light."

Rey looked at her master, her cheeks burning as he explained it all to her. Her own fear and anxiety had been growing as her time spent on Ahch-To progressed. Fear of leaving the planet, fear of facing this strange and confusing force bond with Kylo Ren, fear for her friends in the Resistance. Rey was, in fact, _full_ of fear. Her eyes shifted downward, hoping that her master could not see her shame. But if Luke Skywalker suspected anything of his young padawan, he did not let on. When her embarrassment and uncertainty dissipated, Rey finally looked up at her master, "Is that why you left? Why you came here? Because of fear?"

Luke regarded the young woman before him carefully. She could feel his eyes boring into her, and she immediately regretted asking the question. She was certain he would dismiss it, directing her instead to begin her training for the day.

But much to her surprise, he did not.

"I left the Resistance in its earliest stages because I felt as though I was no use to it." Luke swallowed, "I had become invested in the cause, going so far as to sending my young apprentice on missions for the Resistance."

As Luke told his story, Rey tried to picture it. The newly formed Jedi Academy, with a young Ben Solo has his apprentice. Her breath hitched in her throat as she tried to imagine what he could have possibly been. She flushed at the mere thought of it.

"When I failed in my mission, when I failed the Resistance and my family, I had begun to feel true fear for the future of the, of the galaxy." Luke's voice broke as he recounted his story. Rey watched on, unsure if she should say anything else. But her master continued, "I began to think I would do anything to prevent the outcome I feared the most."

"And that was when you left," Rey finished the thought for him.

Her master nodded, "The battle had become too personal for me; that is not the way of the Jedi. And so I exiled myself here to calm my own fear and to continue my studies as a Jedi knight. So that I would not be tempted by my own fear and the dark side."

Rey looked at the empty cup of chamomile tea in her hands. Small residue from the leaves circled the rim in a delicate pattern. As she eyed the residue, she could not help but think of a man halfway across the galaxy and his own path to the dark side.

If fear was truly the path, then what was he so fearful of?


	4. Mind Games

**This Awful Energy**

 **Summary** : It was simple: he was shrouded in darkness, and she in light. But when she discovers who she truly is, a new legacy is thrust upon her. Can Rey cope with the truth of her own past?

 **Author's Note** : Good evening lovelies! I apologize that this has been update so late. I also apologize that it is so short. But this does have a lot of important information here. Also, I feel as though I should note, the Disciples of Ragnos is from the Extended Universe – if you're interested I would look in to them.

I just want to say thank you to very who stuck by Balance, and this story as well. I know my writing/updating schedule has been crazy – it's actually a New Year's Resolution of mine to work on it. So, it is my plan to have more updates coming at you soon!

 **Chapter Three: Mind Games**

* * *

Kylo Ren looked out at the vast expanse before him. The darkened sky was highlighted by bright stars from systems far away. He looked out proudly at the expanse before him, knowing that he and the First Order were slowly bringing each of those systems under their control. The desolate planet that hovered just below the star destroyer _Retaliator_ would soon fall as well. Even now, storm troopers were bringing the last remnants of the Resistance on the planet to heel. Soon enough, elite forces were ensuring that the planet and its inhabitants would be amenable to the First Order's cause. If all went according to plan, Kylo would receive vital information from one such inhabitant. He could not help but fear a brief surge of pride at all of the latest developments in his mission.

He could feel the summons like a faint pulse in the corner of his mind, interrupting his more pleasant thoughts. Supreme Leader Snoke was calling for him. Immediately, Kylo Ren broke from his peaceful musings to attend to much more pressing matters. It would not do him well to keep the Supreme Leader waiting for too long. He turned on his heel from his command spot on the bridge of the _Retaliator_ he now commanded. Undoubtedly, his master would want updates on the progress of the mission entrusted to him.

Kylo Ren walked briskly as he made his way to Supreme Leader Snoke's receiving chamber. Storm troopers stepped aside, parting the way as he marched down the corridors of the destroyer.

"Excuse me, Lord Ren," A voice disturbed his thoughts, causing the knight to pause. Kylo turned to see a young officer shifting under the knight's scrutiny. Kylo was about to punish the insolence of the lowly ensign that dared to interrupt him, but his mood was still pleasant and he was feeling rather generous.

"Yes, Ensign?" Underneath his helmet, Kylo Ren sounded terrifying.

The young officer looked askance as he relayed the message, "We have just received word from the forces on the ground. The sacking of the planet's capital city was a success. Moreover, the target has been found and subdued. They will return shortly with the prisoner, my lord."

"Very well, Ensign Rake," Kylo's voice boomed with authority. Although the helmet masked his tone well, there was no denying that he was pleased with the news. Now he would have a substantial update to relay to his master. "When the landing team has returned, immediately prepare the prisoner for extraction." The quaking ensign nodded before turning away from Kylo, scurrying off to complete his new orders.

Kylo turned once more, making his way to Snoke's receiving chamber. His master's summons had become stronger the more the apprentice delayed: the pulsing feeling in his mind had now become a pounding that could no longer be ignored. The door to the receiving chamber opened quickly as he approached, and upon crossing the threshold, the pounding in his mind stopped entirely. Snoke's holographic projection was already there, waiting for him to arrive. When he reached the center of the room, he took to his knees and lowered his gaze in deference to his master.

But Supreme Leader Snoke did not have time for any further stalling. A raspy voice asked, "Have you any updates on your new mission, Lord Ren?"

Kylo unlocked the back of his helmet and removed the mask before he nodded, "The defector has been found cowering on a moon of Mandalore, master. He has been secured and is being prepared for extraction as we speak."

"Very good," The pleasure was evident in Snoke's voice, and Kylo Ren beamed with pride. He was determined to prove himself since the unfortunate incident on Starkiller Base, where he had let the scavenger girl slip away after she had managed to momentarily subdue him. A fluke that should not have happened. His blood began to boil in both anger and shame at the memory. "I trust you will be giving our new guest a most hospitable welcome."

Kylo's lips curled upward in a most devious smirk, "Of course, sir."

"Find out what the defector knows by any means necessary, Lord Ren. It is imperative that we have confirmation before we move forward with our plans."

Kylo Ren nodded at his master's orders, which he was always happy to oblige, "It will be done, Supreme Leader."

With a wave of his hand, Supreme Leader Snoke dismissed him. Kylo Ren turned to leave the receiving room. He secured his helmet as walked towards the door; he would not want his face to betray his giddiness at the delightful turn of events. As he made his way out of the doors and into the cold corridors of the ship, his thoughts drifted towards his new prisoner. If the defector could confirm their suspicions, and their plan moved forward without any delays, the fate of the entire galaxy would change irrevocably. He would be able to surpass the legacy of his own grandfather, and bring the galaxy under the influence of the Dark Side once and for all.

His thoughts of dark grandeur carried him to the opposite side of the destroyer, where his new guest would be waiting for him. He entered the extraction chamber to find the defector strapped on to the upright gurney, unable to move. _Excellent,_ he thought to himself as he circled his prisoner like a predator about to pounce on his prey. The defector's eyes went wide at the first site of his captor, and he began to tremble.

"Elix Magistar," Kylo's mechanical voice boomed as he took his position in his prisoner's direct line of vision. He eyed the defector curiously; the man was over twenty years his senior, with sporadic flecks of gray in his dark hair. But the man looked much older than that, much more worn down. Perhaps his cowardice had caused such premature aging. There was also the unmistakable hint of Corellian brandy about the room. Had the man truly been drunk as the time of his capture? It was no mystery as to why the invasion went as smoothly as it did. Inwardly, Kylo scoffed at the pathetic nature of his new captive.

The defector's eyes went wide at the use of his given name, and not the pseudonym he had been falsely registered under for over a decade. Immediately, the old man began to quake on his gurney. "Please, please – you've got the wrong guy. Whatever you think I did, I promise I didn't do it. I'm just a miner. I didn't do anything."

"Silence," With a wave of a hand, all sound coming from the mouth of the defector ceased. Instead, all that the prisoner could do was choke on his own words. Kylo Ren had no need for the man's useless begging. "You defected from the Disciples of Ragnos years ago. The First Order has been tracking the whereabouts of surviving Disciples, Magistar. We have been aware of your location for quite some time – it is no use lying to us."

Kylo released his hold on the man's throat, allowing him to respond. The older man was shaking in the gurney as he stammered, "The – the Disciples are all but extinct. The Republic saw to that. I had no choice but to run from them. They would have killed me with the rest of them."

Kylo Ren was growing exasperated with the man's excuses. He did not have time for the man's stalling. With a single wave of his band, the man's chain of excuses once again devolved into a mere choking sound. As the captive realized his means of communication was now cut off, Kylo Ren sized him up. The defector was barely versed in the Force, having only a mild sensitivity. Peripherally, however, Kylo could sense that the man had come into contact with some very powerful people. From underneath his helmet, the dark knight's lip contorted into a smirk. _This was what he needed to find out._

"You have information that I need on the Disciples of Ragnos," Kylo boomed as he circled Magistar, "I have no desire to listen to your excuses anymore."

Slowly, he began to push himself into the thoughts of the man strapped to the gurney. With very little difficulty, Kylo began to probe his way into his captive's mind. Elix Magistar cried out in agony at the intrusion. Kylo paid no attention to the man's shrieks. He pushed in further, until Magistar's mind fully gave way to his demands. The drunken defector's mind put up no resistance to the Kylo's intrusion. Through the Corellian brandy clouded confusion that was Magistar's memories, Kylo Ren searched for what he was looking for.

His memories were there, but jumbled in a way that the dark knight could not make sense of. The brandy had taken its toll on the man. He could only pull small bits of relevant memories to the forefront of Elix Magistar's mind: a dark planet nestled within the Outer Rim territories, a group of refugees that looked battle-worn and haggard, and an eerily familiar luscious green forest with an abundance of both flora and fauna within it. The last bit of memory caused Kylo Ren to pull back with wonder for a brief moment. He had been to that forest before, in his Force visions with the young scavenger girl. Perhaps she truly was the one that they had been searching for all this time…

The thought made his lips twist upward into a smile.

With a renewed vigor, Kylo Ren pushed deeper into his captive's mind. He could hear the incessant shrieking from the man strapped in the chair, he could feel the man's writhing in the chair – physically trying to remove himself from the painful intrusion. But the dark knight paid no mind to it. He was not at all concerned with the well-being of the man in front of him. He pierced much deeper than he had before, sifting through memories of cowardice and hiding in the years following the reconstruction of the Republic and the new senate's rise to glory. Kylo ignored the irrelevant information floating around in the man's head, focusing on what he had come for…

The same group of refugees that he had seen in the man's head before once again appeared at the forefront of his mind. Although now, the refugees had set up their own settlements on the familiar planet. At that instant, the name of the planet surfaced in Magistar's mind. They were rebuilding the once great planet of Moraband. The knight of Ren's eyebrows lifted at that new information. Kylo watched from Elix Magistar's perspective as the man trudged around the settlement, checking on the wellbeing of the various refugees. But his eyes lingered longer than they should have on one in particular.

To Kylo Ren, this young woman was, for the most part, was wholly unremarkable. The only thing that piqued his interest was that he could sense that she was mildly sensitive to the Force. But to Magistar, on the other hand, that woman was the center of the galaxy. She was so close to him, and yet wholly out of his reach. Her status within the refugees – the Disciples of Ragnos – was far above his own now. Where she had once been his trusted confidant and friend, he could only admire her from afar. And yet, the man would do anything for her, including kill or die for her. He would do whatever he could to protect her and her ch-.

Just then a young toddler, no more than two years old, came bouncing over towards the woman. With all of the affection of a proud and happy mother, the young woman picked up the child and lifted it above her head. The child let out a high pitched giggle at the action; the entire settlement turned around to watch, looking on with both pride and hope at the child. He could even sense a hint of fear in the back of Magistar's mind. But why?

Kylo Ren startled back in shock.

He could sense the utmost power coming from the child. While the mother was only, at best, mildly force-sensitive, the child was radiating with raw and untrained power. It was a power, an aura which he had most certainly felt once before. Kylo pressed further into his captive's memories, focusing solely on the child. The scenery changed, and the woman in the picture looked more tired, more frightened. Kylo could sense the defector's fear in the memory too – their location had been discovered by the New Republic. Magistar had to protect the young woman and the child.

The child was older now, but only by a year or so. There were signs that time had passed; the child was walking with much more ease. It stood taller, and had longer wisps of hair that had been pulled back into three distinct bun on the back of its head. Within Elix Magistar's memories, Kylo Ren gasped.

Kylo had his confirmation.

Immediately, Kylo Ren retreated back from his captive's memories, ignoring Magistar's shrieks of pain as a result of the haste of the process. Leaving the defector immobilized on the gurney, he turned from the room. He signaled to the storm troopers to remove the captive to a holding cell as he stormed out of the extraction room. He did not have time to deal with the captive now. It was his duty to report the news to his master; Supreme Leader Snoke would no doubt be pleased with the latest development.

With a renewed sense of purpose, Kylo hastened to the receiving room for his master. His intense gait was enough for storm troopers to purposefully dodge his path. But he paid the faceless underlings no mind. He had more pressing matters to attend to. He made it to the receiving room rather quickly. As the doors to the great hall were once again opened before him, Kylo Ren stepped in to the room. Before him sat the Supreme Leader, in all his grandeur.

Kylo Ren dutifully fell to his knees, a sign of deference to the Supreme Leader. From his genuflection on the ground, Ren looked up to his master. Without as much as an introduction or a greeting, Kylo Ren stated breathlessly, "All of our suspicions have been confirmed, Supreme Leader. The scavenger girl was the one with the Disciples of Ragnos."

"So it has been confirmed," Snoke's voice bellowed through the large receiving chamber. He sounded pleased, and he raised a holographic hand to his chin in deep thought. Kylo Ren shifted from his position on the ground uncomfortably; it was odd to see the Supreme Leader in such a state. Kylo was unsure of how best to react.

"Yes, Supreme Leader," Kylo Ren replied from his kneeling position. He bowed his head lower to the ground in deference; he was relieved to be able to bring good news before Snoke. After his last mistake on Starkiller, the Supreme Leader would not take kindly to yet another failure. Kylo feared what his reaction would have been.

"And this puts you, Lord Ren, in a peculiar position now. How fares your bond with the girl?" The question was cold and deliberated, and for Supreme Leader Snoke, there could only been one correct answer.

Kylo could feel the hologram's gaze pointed directly at him. He shifted under the gaze uncomfortably, but kept his voice even as he answered Snoke's pressing question. "It remains strong, Supreme Leader. While I cannot locate her, I am able to sense her feelings: her doubts and her fears. She is unable to mask them from me for very long; it is easy for me to deliberately speak to her while she is dreaming."

"Excellent," There was no inflection in the imposing hologram's voice, nothing that betrayed his master's thoughts on Kylo visiting the girl through the Force while she slept. But Kylo could sense that his master was pleased with the developments, and what it meant now for their plan. "You must now do what you can to strengthen the connection you have with the girl. It is only through that connection that we will able to fully use her potential. To finish what the Disciples started."

Beneath his mask, Kylo Ren's lips curled upward in a small smile as he thought about the power that he would be able to achieve once everything that he worked so hard for was realized. He was so close to finally achieving the greatness that his grandfather once held – all he had to do was harness the scavenger's untapped potential.

* * *

When Rey awoke the next morning, the air on Ahch-To seemed to weigh down on her heavier than usual. Her mentor had taken on a more serious attitude in recent days, and that seriousness had easily translated into his training with Rey. Everything had taken one a new meaning upon the discovery of the force-bond. Every moment was far too precious to spend wasted in swimming and exploration of the multiple islands. No, Rey had to now dedicate all of her time and energy to training for the inevitable day of reckoning.

Luke Skywalker had been training her in the arts of shielding her mind and emotions from people would seek to invade it. Rey initially had protested the exercise; after all, she had been able to resist Kylo Ren once before. But Luke wanted Rey to master the skill, and that required more practice. And so, her master insisted on deliberately trying to invade her mind in order for Rey to successfully, and repeatedly, keep him at bay.

Rey could feel Luke Skywalker probing around her head, searching for any crack in her armor that would let him in. His attempts were much gentler than her previous experience with Kylo Ren, and it felt as though Luke was going easy on her. Or, perhaps, he underestimated the cruelty that his own nephew could inflict upon others. No matter the cause, Rey held firm, determined that she at least be successful in this one test of skill.

But Luke persisted, the intensity of his attacks on her mind increasing with each failed attempt. It was apparent now that he had been going easy on her. Rey's head began to pound as she continuously blocked him. She sucked in her breath, determined to focus all of her energy and concentration on the task at hand. Sweat pooled at her temples as her whole body began to quiver from the strain of the exercise.

Rey did not know how long she would be able to hold off her mentor. She could already feel her strength draining from every part of her body. She found herself pushing back on Luke, using the same defensive tactic that she employed on Starkiller. But it was no use; Luke was better skilled in blocking her retaliation than her previous opponent had been.

Suddenly, as if a wave had come crashing down upon her, all of Rey's energy disappeared. The wall that she had put up between her mind and Luke came crashing down, and she could feel her master use that to his advantage. He was suddenly inside her head, pouring through her own memories before she even had the chance to force him out once again.

Before she could even think, Rey was reliving her most recent vision. She could see the dark forests of the planet that she could not yet name. She could see the desolate campsite and ruined temples of her visions. She could sense the overwhelming connection to the place she had never been. It was all laid out in front of her, and in front of Luke Skywalker, like a book waiting to be read.

Rey trusted her master, knowing he would never intentionally search through her memories. In her previous failed attempts, he had been able to break down her wall and pull back before any of her secrets were revealed. But this time was different; the memory surfaced before either master or padawan had time to react to it.

Luke instantly pulled back, retreating from her memories like a child who had touched the scalding surfaced of a recently used ship engine for the first time. When Rey finally surfaced from her memories, gasping for air from the exertion, she noticed that Luke had retreated back from her as well. He stood a few paces back from where he had initially been, as if distancing himself as far as possible from her.

Rey looked away from her master, ashamed of her own memories. While she had kept them from Luke intentionally, Rey had not imagined that they could possibly be that bad. After all she had little to information other than what she could gather from her own feelings from the visions. Perhaps, though, Luke Skywalker could shed some light on the true meanings behind these force visions. Reluctantly, she brought her gaze back up to her master, "What do you think it all means?"

Luke shook his head, "That I do not know. But whatever you have seen, whether they be your own memories or a vision of the future, I do sense that the place you saw was shrouded in darkness."

The way in which Luke's words hung in Ahch-To's stale air made Rey suspect that there was more that he was not telling her. Should she have pressed the matter more? A large part of her was desperate for more information. How could she not be? She gave her master a more pointed look, "There is something else you are not telling me. What is it? What is about that place?"

Rey waited, half expecting a rebuke for the accusatory tone she took with her mentor. But none came. Luke regarded her for a few more moments before speaking, "I do not claim to have any insight as to the true meaning behind your vision. I can only infer based upon my own understanding of the Force."

Rey looked at him, waiting for him to go on.

Luke inhaled, "The planet has a name – Moraband. Are you familiar with it?"

Rey shook her head; no, she was not familiar with the planet at all. She had not come across it in her brief studies, nor had she ever heard of the planet at the trading outposts on Jakku. When Rey did not say anymore, Luke continued, "It was once the home planet of the Sith. The planet has been abandoned for centuries, from my understanding."

 _The Sith._ There was a name Rey had recognized, and it was enough to send chills up her spine. "But the Sith don't exist anymore, right? Weren't the last of the Sith destroyed with the Empire?"

Luke shifted uncomfortably at the question, "They were."

Rey's brow furrowed, "But why did I see this? What does any of this have to do with me?"

Her master eyed her, regarding her skeptically, "I cannot say. Perhaps the planet has a tie to your past, perhaps it has a tie to your future. You do not recall ever having been there before?"

Rey shook her head; all of her memories of her life before being abandoned on Jakku were naturally fuzzy. She had been so very young at the time. But the planet had seemed familiar to her, as if she _had_ been there before. She shifted uncomfortably, casting her eyes downward as she contemplated this all. Could she really have some tie to the planet of the Sith? Her stomach turned into a knot at such a thought.

Luke seemed to notice her discomfort. Clearing his throat, he looked squarely at her, "We do not know the true nature of this vision, what it could mean. Even if there is some tie to your past, it does not define you. I chose to not follow the path that my father took, and so the choice remains yours alone. If, at all, your past was shrouded in darkness, you can always choose the light."

Rey bristled with indignation at the implication that she would ever chose anything but. A part of her wanted to fire back at her master for suggesting such a thing. But she bit her tongue and held back any sort of response; she had a feeling that anything she said would only be met with more chiding from Luke.

"Have these visions been weighing you down?" Luke posed the question, and there was nothing but concern for his padawan in his eyes.

Rey nodded, as she ran her hand through the back of her hair. She did not look to her master as she admitted, "They frighten me."

But as the words came out, Rey instantly regretted them. Master Luke had told her time and time again that fear was the path to the dark side. Her words hung in the stale air like an admission of guilt. She looked back up at her master, trying to gauge his reaction to her own confession.

The look in his eyes told her he was thinking the same thing.


	5. Revelations

**This Awful Energy**

 **Summary** : It was simple: he was shrouded in darkness, and she in light. But when she discovers who she truly is, a new legacy is thrust upon her. Can Rey cope with the truth of her own past?

 **Author's Note** : Hey everyone! I'm sorry for the delay here. But school has been absolutely crazy, and lesson planning and grading has been taking over my life. However, here we are with another chapter of This Awful Energy. Things are going to start picking up a little bit here, and I hope that you all like this! Please let me know what you think – I really appreciate all of the feedback.

Also, I promise this chapter has the last Force vision in it for a while!

* * *

 **Chapter Four:** Revelations

Rey opened her eyes, finding herself in the dark forest of Moraband once more. Her realization at the location no longer surprised her; her dreams had taken her to the strange planet almost every night since she had discovered the truth of her visions. It was as if the planet itself were calling to her, forcing itself into her dreams so that she could not ignore it. Rey both looked forward to and resented her nightly visions – hoping that they would lead her to answers but resenting their necessity in the first place.

Her eyes scanned the now familiar tree line until they fell upon the temple in the distance. She had seen the temple before, it loomed over the comfortable forest – a constant in every single one of her dreams. And yet, she had never truly paid attention to the domineering structure until now. The top of the dark pyramid-like structure was breathtaking in a way that Rey could not quite identify. The temple on Moraband was undoubtedly different from the remnants of the one on Ahch-To. She could only assume that the temple in her visions belonged to the Sith. But that was not the only difference. Here, the abandoned temple seemed to vibrate with life – something that Rey could not quite explain.

But it was enough to pique her curiosity, and so Rey began to make her way towards it.

Rey did not know how long she possibly could have been walking for. Time seemed to move differently in her visions. But Rey could tell that she was not making any progress in reaching the temple. The more that she walked, the further away the temple seemed. Rey picked up her pace and soon enough she was sprinting towards the Sith temple. The rocks on the forest floor pierced through her heel, scraping the bottom of her feet. She could feel the throbbing from the incision, but she ignored the pain.

She was so close.

The temple was no longer moving away from her. She was able to see it getting closer and closer as she ran towards it. Her heart rate picked up in excitement at the prospect of exploring this new temple.

"Do you even know what you are running to?" The voice felt like a whisper in her eat, it was so close. Rey stopped immediately t the sound, her head whipping around desperately to find the source of the noise. She recognized the voice immediately, of course. It did not come as a shock that she would find him here. After all, she saw him almost every night these days.

Kylo Ren stood before her like a phantom haunting her dreams. Rey closed her eyes, desperate to will her enemy away. After all, this was only a dream and he was not really there. But when Rey opened her eyes, he remained standing before her.

The dark knight took a step towards Rey. Every single impulse in her body told her to move; to pick up her feet and begin running once more. And yet, her feet remained firmly planted in their place. Rey did not move, with the exception of squaring her jaw in determination. She was not frightened of him; he could do no physical harm to her here. He could only speak to her.

And she would not give him the satisfaction of terrorizing her.

"I could help you to find out," A gloved hand reached out to her, his open palm inviting her to join him. "The First Order saved the old archives from the Empire, they had the most complete annals of the time. Join me, and we will find the answers. Together."

 _Answers._ The word coiled around her in her head like a snake. Rey bit her bottom lip; at this point, she had more questions than he had answers. And the more she found out, the further away from the truth she seemed. It would be so easy to just go to Kylo Ren, only long enough to get the information that she so desperately needed.

But that was exactly why she could not go with him.

The moment she made her decision, almost instantaneously, her vision began to slip away from her. The forests of Moraband shifted in her view, changing to something else entirely. Rey cried out, desperate to return – to find what was so tempting about the Sith temple that made a nightly appearance in her dreams. She frantically tried to grasp at something – _anything_ – to hold on to that vision.

But it slipped away from her anyway.

The scene around Rey changed, and slipped into one of sheer chaos. People were running around what appeared to be a makeshift, rundown campsite. There was an air of urgency about the camp. Rey waited to see what had caused such chaos. But the Force would not allow her to idly watch as the vision unfolded. Rey was at the center of this vision.

" _Varj – brother, the baby is coming."_ The words came out of her mouth before she could even realize what they had meant. But the sharp pain coming from her abdomen answered that question for her. Rey's hand flew to her stomach at the contract, and she let out a cry of pain.

Her words set the entire refugee company into a frenzy, as they realized that they would all play a role in the safe delivery of her very powerful child. In the absence of a proper medical ward or medical droids, they would all be conscripted to aid in the process. Water was collected and boiled down for sanitation, and a makeshift tent was erected for the birthing process. But she could not pay attention to the ceaseless commotion around her. All she could do was scream in pain.

The labor was long, and for her, extremely painful. She cursed the Force, cursed her brother for refusing to wait until after the child was born to journey to Moraband, she even cursed Marka Ragnos himself from inflicting such a hardship on her. She cursed through the pain. She cried through the pain. She pushed through the excruciating pain. Until finally, the pain seemed to ebb away and was replaced by another sensation.

Exhaustion.

Almost every instinct was telling her to rest, now that the hard part was over. She could feel the exhaustion rippling through her, threatening to take her. And yet, she only had one desire.

"Let me hold my son."

Some of her attendants looked at her warily, as if something had not gone according to plan. But none of them said anything alarming. She could see those tasked with helping her work in a frenzy to clean off the baby. The child – the son she was promised – was already squirming around. He was healthy. As the water washed away the blood, she could see the outline of the perfect being she had created. She smiled as she the beautiful naked baby was placed in her arms. As she looked down, she did notice that not everything had gone according to plan. But that did not matter to her.

Wisps of beautiful brown hair matched with big beautiful brown eyes. To her, the child in her arms was so perfect.

The baby girl in her arms was so perfect.

* * *

Rey's eyes opened as the dream violently slipped away from her. Her heart was hammering, and she found herself gripping the edges of her makeshift mattress so tightly that her knuckles were white. What the kriff had that dream been about? Never before had she experienced a vision through someone else's eyes. The sensation was strange – confusing. Taking the back end of her sleeves, Rey wiped away all signs of her tumultuous dream; she could not worry about it right now. She let out a dramatic exhale, before throwing the blankets from her bed. Daylight was pouring in to the homestead; Rey had overslept.

As she stood up and prepared for her day, Rey realized just how tired she actually was. While she had slept later than she should have, her body felt heavy with exhausted. There was no doubt that her sleep was definitely not restful the previous night. She rubbed her eyes as she made her way out to the training field.

Luke was already waiting for her as she stepped into Ahch-To's harsh daylight, a sparring saber in her hand. Rey tried her hardest to hide her disappointment at the training exercise – she was far too exhausted to spar with Luke. But Luke was determined that the intensity of her training increase. And so, Rey gritted her teeth in silence as Luke held out the training saber to her.

Luke ignited his own saber, and Rey followed suit. The distinct hum of the lightsaber seemed to focus Rey, causing her to forget the dreams that haunted her. Her movements were still slow as she swung the weapon, but the measure felt good for her muscles. Luke was the first on the offensive, swinging the weapon hard down towards Rey.

Rey dodged the attack, veering her body to the left as her master swung at her. Her body hit the ground of the training pit with a large thud. Rey groaned as she picked herself up off of the floor. But Luke was far too quick for her; as Rey was recouping, Luke slashed the training weapon across the bottom of her legs. While not destructive, the sparring weapon burned her calves. Rey cried out in pain, her legs giving out against the weapon. She collapsed on the ground, and her master sheathed his weapon.

Luke extended his hand to Rey, an offering of peace and respite. But Rey ignored her master's hand, choosing instead to pull herself off the ground. She gritted her teeth as she turned toward her master, igniting her saber once again. Determined to show her master that she was fully capable of the rigor that he expected, she thrust forwards onto the offensive. Using both hands, she brought her blue blade down hard. But Luke seemed to have the foresight to predict her moves, spinning to his left to doge her attack.

"Son of a bantha," Rey mumbled to herself, as she tried to recover from the attack. Her brow furrowed in frustration as Luke easily maneuvered around her. Rey's eyes followed her master's movements in a desperate attempt to predict his next attack. But Luke could easily hide his intentions from his padawan, causing her to fumble awkwardly as she tried to block him.

"You are focusing too much on what my next movement might be," Luke instructed between attacks and parries. "Close your eyes, focus on the Force. Let it flow through you, let it guide your movements."

Rey let out a frustrated sigh, but listened to her master nonetheless. She closed her eyes, allowing herself to feel the subtle vibrations of the Force. She could feel Luke's movements, and Rey hastened to counteract them. She moved too quickly, bringing her saber down before Luke even moved to attack her. The burning sensation of the training blade seared through her shoulder, causing Rey to cry out in pain. Her saber flew from her hands, tumbling across the training pit. Rey called to her saber, hoping to get it in time to deflect the next attack.

But the saber did not come, Rey was far too distracted by the pain in her shoulder.

Luke did not stop his advance at the sight of his padawan's failure. He was determined that their training session be the most rigorous. As his saber came down, ready to strike, Rey stuck out her hand in an attempt to block the shot. Closing her eyes, she concentrated all of her energy and focus on preventing Luke from once again striking her. With her eyes closed, she focused all of her desire to prove herself on the one task. Rey could feel all of the strange power of the Force radiating through her.

Luke's lightsaber never came down on her.

She expected that Luke pause midair, unable to swing the practice saber forward. Luke did stop, but not because his actions had been paused. Instead, his weapons had to be diverted to his own defense. Rey opened her eyes to the horror that emitted from her palms. She watched with wide eyes as Luke deflected the blue lightening that was coming from her own hands. Instantly, Rey lowered her hands, breaking her connection with the Force and stopping the lightening immediately.

Rey's jaw hung open at the sight of the power that she had just emitted; she had never done something like that before. She had not even known it was something that the Jedi could do. Eyes wide, she looked towards her master for both explanation and congratulations on a job well done. But as she met her master's gaze, there was a mix of something that Rey could not quite place. A mixture of remembrance and horror. Her shoulders collapsed in defeat as she took in his expression; this was not something for Rey to be proud of.

"How did you do that?" Luke's voice was just barely above a whisper.

Rey shook her head, unable to offer any explanation as to how she accomplished something. She had been so determined to block Luke's advance, the lightening that had come from her palms was completely unintentional. She looked to her master for answers as to _what_ exactly she had done. But Luke remained speechless, his head shaking ever so slightly. Rey hung her head in shame, waiting for some indication of what her next steps – her punishment – may be. But the reproach from Luke Skywalker never came. Instead, her master inhaled sharply, "This has been – this is something that you can never do again, Rey. This is something that I need to consider – to meditate on. I suggest you do the same."

Without another word, Luke left Rey to her own thoughts.

Rey attempted to listen to her master's advice and meditated, but she could not bring herself to. Her mind was reeling with unanswered question on what she had just done, and they would not stop no matter how desperately she tried. She despised being left to dwell on what she had just done, like a child in need of a time out. But her master's reaction, his hasty retreat away from her, made Rey anxious as well. He recognized what she had done, and it frightened him terribly.

A sinking feeling of shame settled in the pit of Rey's stomach.

What if she was not meant to be a Jedi?

What if she had disappointed her master?

The thoughts of crippling self-doubt were Rey's only source of comfort for hours, until her master finally returned from his solitude. Luke remained quiet as he entered the small homestead; it was so quiet that Rey could hear her heart hammering in her ears. She watched expectantly as she waited for the almost inevitable scolding from Luke Skywalker.

But it never came.

Instead, Rey looked on as he began to boil water over the small flame ignitor. Her mouth hung open slightly as she watched him steep leaves. Rey was about to question what exactly he was doing when he thought better of it. After a few agonizing moments of silence, Rey graciously accepted when her master placed a steaming cup of tea in front of her. She raised the hot liquid to her lips, letting the herbal remedy soothe her nerves.

Luke sat down across from her, and raised his own cup and took a drink. When he put the cup down, he looked square at Rey. "You should not have been able to do what you did today. No one should."

Rey's lip parted, ready to offer up some form of explanation or excuse for her actions. But she truly had none to give. Luke, however, did not seem to want one either. He continued, "I have only seen one person able to do this in my life, Rey. It is not something that a Jedi should do."

Luke inhaled, but his voice remained even as he stated, "I would like to know _how_ exactly you were able to do that. Was it in connection to my nephew?"

Rey shook her head as she choked out, "I – I don't really know. I'm not sure how it happened. I've never even seen, let alone done, something like this before. Please, you have to believe me." Her voice was pleading with her master.

Luke Skywalker exhaled at her pathetic explanation, "I do, Rey. I do believe that you have never consciously been exposed to such power before. But that does not change the fact that you were able to do something so concerning. That is a tool that is used by those who practice the Dark Side of the Force; a Sith power."

Rey could not help the gasp that escaped her lips. _A Sith?_

Her master watched her reaction carefully, but did not acknowledge it. Instead, he continued, "I realize this may be an unpleasant thought, but I do wonder if there are some memories you have, however repressed they may be, that would help shed some light on all of this. I would like to lead you through some guided meditation in hopes of recovering some answers."

Rey bit her lip, unsure if this was something that she really wanted to know the answer to. How could she live with knowing that kind of truth? Or worse, what would happen if she found out something equally as horrid? But as she thought about it, Rey wondered if she truly had a choice in the matter. Luke was eyeing her expectantly and Rey shifted under his gaze.

Rey inhaled sharply and closed her eyes, trying to clear her mind. But instead of the inner peace that meditation brought, she only felt the twisting of fear in the bottom of her stomach. That itself was the only feeling she could focus on; she could not find the inner peace that such intense meditation should have brought. Opening her eyes, she sighed in frustration. She shook her head, "I ca-can't do it."

"Yes, you can." Luke's voice was calm but forceful. Gently, Luke grabbed Rey's arm and began to inhale deeply. Rey mimicked his actions, watching as his chest rose and fall. She timed her breathing to match his, the calm feeling she initially fought finally reaching her. Everything else seemed to fall away as a sea of serenity washed over her.

* * *

And suddenly, Rey was no longer sitting in the rickety homestead she shared with Luke Skywalker. Instead, she was back on Moraband. Back _home_. But unlike her visions of the past, where Rey watched passively as she uncovered some of the strange truths about her, Rey was actively a part of the vision. She was running, her bare feet lightly hitting the forest floor. She looked at the settlement around her in a mixture of both familiarity and wonder.

She was viewing the world through a child's eyes.

Rey's heart was hammering in her tiny chest as her eyes grazed the surrounding area. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see a figure hidden in the tree-line. With a giddy laugh, Rey darted after it, as fast as her little legs would take her. She weaved in and out of trees and launched herself over the rocks in order to catch the elusive figure. She just had to catch it this time. She just had to win.

As she tried to win the little game, Rey lifted some of the larger rocks in to the air – so she would not have to spend too much of her energy climbing over the boulders that were so much bigger than her. She laughed as she did so, there was something in her childlike mind that found the action funny.

But her mirth was short lived. The sound of her laughter was deafened by the roar of landing shuttles. Rey looked up, her eyes wide with wonder and fear. It was as if she had never seen such a machine before. But almost instinctively, she knew that the sound could only mean something bad was about to happen.

 _The bad people were here._

Her running, which had once been leisurely, took on a much more frantic pace as she sprinted for safety. _Keep low_. The reminder that had been drilled in to her head seemed to come of use, to keep her hidden from the bad people. Her little heart picked up its pace as she tried to reach the one person in the galaxy that she knew would protect her.

She stumbled over the rocks and overgrowth that made up her playground as her little legs carried her down a familiar path as fast as they could possibly take her. But the landing shuttles were faster than her by far. An anxious feeling washed over her as she reached the budding settlement at the edge of the forest. Unfamiliar droids were rolling around the camp, accompanied by the bad people she was always warned about. They were carrying weapons that she had never seen before.

Her eyes scanned the surrounding area, searching for any familiar face among the chaos. She ducking behind a rock on the forest's edge, trying to keep herself hidden from the bad people who invaded her home. She could see people she recognized as friends – good people – who were being brought into a pen that had always been used to hold livestock. Rey's eyes narrowed as she focused on the group of prisoners, looking for the one face that really mattered to her.

But she was not there.

Rey sighed in relief; maybe she had gotten away from the bad people! Rey began to turn, ready to check her favorite hiding spot. After all, she had always told Rey to go there if something bad ever happened. But as Rey was turning, in the corner of her eye, she could now see the person she had been searching for, laying unmoving on the ground less than a kilometer away from her.

All of the warnings that she had been given about the bad people seemed to disappear from her memory. Instinctively, Rey's feet began to carry her forward across the open field as she cried out, "Mama!"

The young Rey grabbed the sleeves of the motionless women, shaking them violently in an attempt to get her to rise. Rey did not know what kind of game she was playing – they had never done this one before. Surely her mama knew that it was not the right time to be playing a game – the bad people were here now. But her mother still did not move.

Rey looked in to the eyes of the woman on the ground, eyes that so clearly matched her own. _Something is not right._ Rey let out a child-like cry as she clung to her mother, the sound echoing around the chaotic settlement. But Rey could not find it in her to hold herself back anymore as the feeling of a terrible loss settled in.

Her childlike cries quickly turned into uncontrollable sobs that drowned out the rest of the bedlam in the settlement. So consumed with grief, Rey did not even notice the circle of people that had gathered around her curiously. It was only when they began speaking that the chorus of voices interrupted the mourning of her mother.

"There wasn't supposed to be children here." A shocked voice rang out, causing Rey to turn to see who had gathered around her. Among the sea of orange jumpsuits, Rey saw that a woman had spoken. The woman appeared to be kind, but Rey could only focus on the fact that she was one of the bad people – the people that killed her mother.

Although her younger self did not know the woman, through the vision Rey realized that it was a much younger General Organa. She hissed back to the sea of people orange jumpsuits around her, "Our intelligence said nothing about children living here."

"Well, obviously we were wrong about that." A frustrated voice countered. Rey frantically turned her little head around, only to be greeted with the exasperated expression of Han Solo looking back at her.

"This kind of settlement – what they are doing – is no place for a child."

"Someone seems to have thought differently."

Rey watched on as the two fought over what they were going to do with her. _She was just a child_ , they said. _But living here meant that she knew something – she could be questioned. Her naiveté meant that she would be more likely to talk._

"The Republic told us to completely neutralize the threat," Someone that Rey did not recognize chimed in, cutting both Leia and Han off. "We were told to leave no survivors."

"She is a child. We cannot –"

But Rey did not let the woman finish her speech. Anger and fear boiled inside her, making her ready to lash out in self-preservation at the man who threatened to hurt her. Instinctively, she rose her hand to perform the trick that her Uncle Varj had taught her. She had never been any good at the trick when practicing with her uncle, but she also had never wanted to hurt someone so much in her young life. Almost immediately, the purple lightening hit the man who had threatened her life square in the chest.

The man collapsed into a heap on the ground. Rey shaking, turned towards the rest of the bad people who surrounded her. Each of them took a step back, fearful of what the young child would do next.

"Did you see that?"

"What _was_ that?"

The cautious whispers echoed around Rey. Tears began falling down her face once again, the fear of what would happen to her now that mother was gone returning. After a few moments, someone Rey did not recognize grabbed her by the hands, further restraining her from causing any more damage. Rey struggled against the adult's grip, but she was quickly overpowered.

"This explains why she was here, Leia." Han whispered. "Luke and the Republic knew what they were trying to do. Maybe they were gathering their own force-sensitive people to help bring him back."

Leia shook her head, "But she's just a little girl, an innocent in all of this. Luke would never knowingly give the order to hurt a child."

"We can take her to Luke," Han suggested, running his hands through his hair in exasperation. "He would know what to do with her. Maybe he could help her, with the other kids he is training."

The general shook her head immediately, "We can't do that. Luke had too much on his plate right now. He's just taken on Ben, and having her there might not be a good influence on him. That's a Sith power – you know what Ben would do if he saw that."

Han let out a frustrated sigh, "Then what do you suggest we do? Follow our orders and _kill her_?"

"Of course not!" Leia's exclaimed indignantly. "We just have to find a place for her. Far away from all of this."

"And what happens when she gets old enough to come looking for us, huh?" Han frowned. Rey watched as the two adults discussed what to do with her. Part of her knew it was best for her to try and run away, but she did not want to leave her mama.

Leia put her hands to her temples, in deep thought for a moment. "A few years ago, Luke tried to teach me about the Force. He taught me some skills that he thought would be useful to me, although I wasn't interested in much else. But he did teach me something called a memory rub, something I could do to erase memories."

Han shook his head, "You can't be serious, Leia."

"What other choice do we have?" Leia cried out. When Han Solo did not respond, Leia continued, "We have to find a place for her out of the reaches of any other radicals in the galaxy."

Leia paced for a moment, eyeing Rey as she did so. After what seemed like forever, the general stopped pacing, "Lor San Tekka. He's taken up residence on the junkyard planet of Jakku. He can keep an eye on her, and send us intelligence if he notices that she has begun to remember anything, or if anyone ever comes looking for her."

"You want to send her to Jakku?" Han asked incredulously, but let out a sigh of defeat as he once again ran his hands through his brown hair, "I've done some business with Unkar Plutt before. I'll take her, and see that he at least gives her a chance at surviving that waste of a planet."

Leia nodded, and turned her attention back towards Rey. She knelt in front of her, her gaze appearing both friendly and concerned. She held out her hand for Rey to take as she cooed, "Don't worry little one. We won't hurt you, we promise."

* * *

 _We won't hurt you, we promise._

Leia's words carried her out of her vision, the only words she could hear over the pounding of her heart. Rey came too with a loud gasp of breath, as her eyes began brimming with tears from the stress of the vision. Normally, Rey would hide her discomfort and keep herself and her emotions in check. But she was too overwhelmed and the tears began to flow freely.

Luke's eyes widened at Rey's reaction to the vision, and he put his arms on her shoulder's in an attempt at comfort. Rey did not move away, although the action brought her very little comfort. Luke let her calm herself before he gently asked, "What did you see?"

Rey shook her head, unable to get the words out. After all, there was still so much she did not know. Who was the group of people that lived on Moraband? Why did she only know of the Republic as "the bad people"? Why would Leia and Han have been given orders to kill everyone?

"Rey," Luke's voice was calm, the gentlest that she had seen him in weeks, "If you want me to help you, you need to tell me what you saw."

Rey swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat, and took a deep breath before explaining herself, "I saw my family – my mother."

Luke looked at her, waiting for her to regain some of the composure she lost. She took a moment before elaborating. Rey made no attempt to hide the pure malice in her voice, "She was killed on Moraband. By the Republic – your _sister_ was there."

Luke bristled and Rey could not tell if it was at the revelation or at the tone that she had used. But it did not matter, the last Jedi recoiled at the information, "Rey – I did not know about this. Truly."

Rey did not doubt that her master had no knowledge of her mother's death; her vision suggested as much. But he did give the order for the pilots to attack her home there; he did know that there were _people_ on that planet. Rey turned away from her master, "I need to think on things, Master. I would like to be alone."

Her master nodded, standing up to leave Rey. But before he left her with her thoughts, Luke turned back to his padawan, "Remember, Rey – there is no emotion, there –"

"Is peace." Rey finished the part of the code for him; she knew it by heart. Although, as Luke left her alone with her own thoughts, the words now sounded completely hollow.


	6. An Escape Plan

**This Awful Energy**

 **Summary** : It was simple: he was shrouded in darkness, and she in light. But when she discovers who she truly is, a new legacy is thrust upon her. Can Rey cope with the truth of her own past?

 **Author's Note** : I get a snow day, you get an update.

 **Chapter Five:** An Escape Plan

* * *

For Rey, finding sleep that night felt like fighting with one of the Unkar Plutt's thugs for the last piece of scavenged metal before the trading post was closed for the night – difficult and immensely useless. Hours later, her mind was still reeling from all of the revelations that her vision had brought her. What if she was never supposed to come to Ahch-To in the first place? What if she were never meant to be a Jedi?Where was she supposed to go from here? Could she even trust the Resistance anymore? When they were able to slaughter her family – to consider killing a child – without any consideration for the destruction that was left behind? Rey was consumed with all of the possibilities – all of the questions that had taken up residence in her head now. All of the _what ifs._

The thoughts left Rey's stomach in knots. She truly did not know what to think about her most recent discoveries. Luke seemed to notice this as well, as there had been a significant change in his demeanor towards her.

"I understand that you are upset at the moment, and that I am one of the last people you want to talk to," Her master had said to her, his eyes casting the pitying look that he had been giving her all night. He had been much kinder to her, much gentler in consideration of her most recent emotional state, "Trust your instincts, Rey. And when you are ready to talk to me about this, I will be ready."

 _Trust your instincts, Rey._

Rey chewed her lips as she thought about Luke and his kindness towards her. What were her instincts telling her about that? It was obvious that, despite his involvement with the Resistance, Luke did not know much about his sister's connection with the murder of Rey's mother.

But could Rey even bring herself to fight for the cause that could do such a thing?

A mixture of both sadness and rage welled up inside of her, threatening to boil over at any moment. The amount of anger that she felt frightened her, but wasn't it justified? General Organa has welcomed her into the Resistance. Han Solo had taken her under his wing; he had been the closest thing that Rey had ever had to a father. How could he have done that to her? How could he have acted as if nothing was wrong? Had either of them even remembered such a completely life alerting event?

Perhaps this was why Han Solo had offered her that job all of those months ago – to alleviate some of the guilt, if he even had any. Rey sat up in the makeshift bed, a frustrated sigh escaping from the back of her throat. Her resentment at her situation made it impossible for her to lay still and find rest. Rey threw the small blanket away from her body and let her feet touch the cold floor. Before she knew it, she found herself ducking out past Luke Skywalker's sleeping form and out of the small home.

Rey wondered if Luke had heard her sneaking out, what he would have thought about it all. He wanted her to open up to him, no doubt so that he could tell her that everything she was feeling was against the Jedi Code. Rey ran her fingers through her undone hair; there was a small part of her that needed to tell someone everything that she felt. But she did not know if she could fully trust everything that Luke stood for. Would he help her to find the answers that she was looking for so desperately? Rey looked up at the night sky as she contemplated the answer to the question. Could she really ask Luke to confront the possibility that his family did something horrible to hers?

Rey did not think that she could. And so she was left to deal with her anger herself.

She looked up at the stars, thinking about all of the far off and removed from the crushing weight of her problems. Rey thought of the cause she was fighting for. The cause spearheaded by General Organa – the woman who killed her mother. Could she even stand to fight for the cause? To stand behind her mother's murderers?

Rey did not think that she could.

She was no longer fighting for the right cause anymore.

At least the First Order was open about the horrific methods that the used. They shamelessly ripped children from their families to raise them as brutal soldiers. They proudly built weapons that could destroy entire solar systems. The Resistance only hid their atrocities and claimed their moral high ground.

"What a load of kriff," Rey mumbled to herself as she ran her hands through her hair, "I've got to get away from this place."

Already, the plan was forming in her head.

Quickly, Rey charged back into her room. As quietly as she possibly could, Rey fumbled around in the dark for her meager belongings. She did not have much to pack away. But then again, Rey had never had much to her name to begin with. Resentment flowed through her at the thought, causing her blood to boil once again. Who knows what her life could have been like if her family had not been murdered? With unnecessary force, Rey shoved the remainders of her measly possessions into the small bag.

Rey shook her head, pushing all of the vile and unnecessary thoughts from her mind. She had a plan that needed to put in to place.

Rey looked down at the belongings in front of her: the satchel and the lightsaber that had been gifted to her by Luke Skywalker. The tool that she had used to complete her training had once been a huge part of her. It called to her on Takodana, bringing her down a path she never would have chosen for herself. It helped her to defeat Kylo Ren on Starkiller Base, helping her to see her own power in the Force. It has been her constant companion these past few months. But as she gazed at the elegant tool now, it felt foreign to her. Luke's saber carried with it the legacy of rebellion and resistance – something that Rey did not think that she could continue. The lightsaber, although it had never left her side, was not really hers. It had never truly belonged to her in the first place; it was never meant to.

Rey grabbed her bag and turned on her heel, leaving Luke Skywalker's lightsaber behind.

Silently, Rey slipped out of the homestead on the top of the tallest peak on Ahch-To. The moon was still high in the sky; she had plenty of time left. She made her way down the mountain, her feet stumbling over the jagged rocks in the dark. Momentum was pulling her forward and she found herself almost running down the mountain, desperate to be away from the sacred planet before Luke woke up at daybreak.

It was not long before Rey was at the pebbled beach that lined the mountainous island, the same spot where the Millennium Falcon had carried her to months ago. Even now, Rey could remember the butterflies and apprehension that she felt as she began her quest to find the last Jedi. It was as if those same butterflies were taking up residence in her stomach once again.

"I cannot believe I am doing this," Rey muttered to herself, breathlessly.

Rey looked out at the beach, where an unmanned escape shuttle was standing guard. Rey smiled, giving a brief and undeserved thanks to the Resistance for having the foresight to provide means of transport. The Rebellion Era spacecraft was left along with two holo-pad communicators after the final supply run to Ahch-To months ago, originally intended for when Rey and Luke were ready to once again join the Resistance.

But Rey did not think she would ever be ready to return to them. Not until she had her answers.

And so, without any hesitation, Rey climbed in to the pilot's chair of escape shuttle. She gripped the controls and thrusters, trying to get a feel for the outdated spacecraft. It was an older model, with parts that she would have scavenged and only received a quarter portion for back on Jakku.

Using the outdated controls, Rey accessed the tiny spacecraft's navigation system. The maps themselves were old, but Rey had to hope that none of the planets or systems had changed much in the years since the Rebellion. She imputed Moraband into the system as the ship began searching through the database for the location of the planet.

The engine whirred as the machines in the old fighter combed the database for the planet. The coordinates had to be buried deep within the system, as the sun was beginning to rise on the island when Moraband was finally located. Rey's heartbeat accelerated as she set her course – she was really doing this.

As the sun rose on Ahch-To, so did the old shuttle. Rey watched as a sea of green and blue passed underneath her as she left the sacred planet's atmosphere. As she was leaving, she turned back to look at the planet that had been her home for months now. She thought of her master, and had to wonder if he had already awakened to find her missing.

Perhaps he expected that she would leave all along.

* * *

Rey looked out of the small window of the cockpit, the stars moving at what felt to her like a glacial pace. Debris from space were hurling past her tiny escape shuttle, forcing her to expertly maneuver around the abundance of rocks and junk that were headed her way. She was lucky that the debris was few and far between, allowing her plenty of time to anticipate any modifications she had to make. One she was confident that she was finally clear of the debris field, she sighed heavily, looking at the empty shuttle cabin. The unmanned seat next to her felt even more lonely as she thought of who was supposed to be there. Rey and Luke were supposed to travel back to the Resistance together on the spacecraft. But circumstances had changed, and Rey left her master behind.

She looked despondently at the empty shuttle, wondering _what exactly she was supposed to do now._

According to the navigation system on the outdated shuttle, Moraband was on the far side of the Outer Rim territories. It would take her ages to travel from one place to another at the speed she was going. Idly, she wondered if the ancient shuttle had a hyper drive core that could maintain any significant time at light speed.

Rey sincerely doubted it. But she could not help but begin to fiddle with the ship's navigation system with the small hope that something would happen. After a few moments of pressing buttons she did not recognize, Rey finally found what she believed to be the shuttle's hyper drive generator. Eagerly, Rey attempted to jump start the ship's ancient generator with a few routine tricks. She was ready to be out of the small cramped shuttle.

The _whirring_ sound of the hyper drive generator surrounded the shuttle, leaving Rey with the hope that hyper space was soon within reach.

The whirring sound of the old engine, however, morphed into a pathetic sputtering. The shuttle lurched forward slightly causing Rey to slide forward in her seat. Almost as quickly, the outdated shuttle sputtered once more before continuing to chug along at its leisurely pace.

"Of course," Rey mumbled to no one in particular as she sat back in her seat, resigned to the fact that her great escape was now marred by the ancient contraption that simply could not move fast enough. Rey sighed as she leaned back, bringing the palm of her hands to her temples. She rubbed the side of her head, "At least I have time to come up with a really good plan."

Minutes seemed to pass like hours as the small escape craft carried Rey through the depths of space. She easily grew sick of counting the different systems as she passed by them, and found her eyes begin to grow heavy as the time passed. She did not know how much more of this idle waiting she could possibly take.

 _Beep. Beep. Beep._

The alarm immediately brought Rey out of her pre-slumber state. Her eyes locked on the ship's radar detection system, hoping that she was only hearing an indicator of some radar malfunction. But Rey had no such luck.

"Kriff," Rey let out a small curse under her breath as she analyzed the data before her: there were multiple spacecraft within range from here. From the look of it, at least one of them was rather large command ship that loomed over all of the rest. Rey gulped as calculated her odds. There was no way that she had not already been spotted by whoever was out there. Rey took a look out of the solar shield on the escape pod, hoping to get a better view of the ships that were in her vicinity.

"Kriff, kriff, kriff!" Rey exclaimed again as she saw that multiple First Order TIE fighters were gliding through space rather quickly in her direction. No other ships were out there besides hers and those belonging to the First Order, and they would no doubt be curious about the old Rebellion era escape pod chugging along the Outer Rim all alone.

Rey continued accelerating her speed as she tried to maneuver away from the enemy vessels. She silently prayed that they would just let her continue along her way. But the First Order fighters were already on her tail, and gaining on her quickly.

It was then that she heard the distinct chirping that signaled another ship was hailing her. It was coming from the command ship nearby. Without slowing down, Rey turned on the communication system and let the hail's audio play throughout the empty shuttle.

"Unidentified ship, state your call sign and prepare to be boarded." The disembodied voice was calm and collected. After all, Rey's ship was an easy target, and they had her all but surrounded. Rey looked at the controls around her, wondering what she could possibly do to get out of this situation. There was no way that she was going to let herself get caught by the First Order again without a fight.

"Sorry," Rey said to no one in particular, "But I haven't got time to stop today."

Instead of responding to the hail, Rey maximized her acceleration. The old ship lurched forward, jolting Rey from her seat. Her body hit the control panel of the cockpit hard, and her senses seemed to dull. But she did not have time to wait around; she was being pursued. Rey slumped over the control panel, reaching for the ship's throttle. Within seconds, the throttle was ignited and the ship's speed leaped.

But she was not moving fast enough. The agile TIE fighters were advancing steadily, gaining on her with each passing second.

Rey had to do something, _anything_ , to get the First Order off of her tail.

Without a thought, Rey changed her direction. But the TIE pilots were quick enough to react to the sudden change. They were still following closely behind Rey. Muttering a curse under her breath, Rey looked to the expanse of space in front of her. What had seemed like little flecks in the distance were getting larger and larger by the second as she realized she had turned straight into an asteroid field.

"Damnit!" Rey cursed, swinging herself so that she could reach for the ship's equilibrium controls. She would have to manually navigate the field.

Rey risked a look at her radar system; the First Order was still gaining on her.

Rey turned her attention back to the danger in front of her, instead of the threat behind her. Perhaps, if she could move quickly enough, the asteroids would take care of the TIE fighters and their pilots for her. Instinctively, Rey reached for the controls and send her ship skyrocketing in altitude to avoid an oncoming rock that was hurdling towards her.

Before she even cleared the first asteroid, Rey had to evade yet another space rock that was barreling in her direction. She veered right, causing the slip to fly on an angle to avoid any impact. In the distance, Rey could see the distinct outline of a planet at the end of the dangerous asteroid field. Her face lit up, the danger was soon over. Rey let out a giggle, and accelerated her speed slightly.

Rey too another risk, looking down at the radar to see where her enemies were. Fewer TIE fightrs were within range of the radar system, and it appeared her plan had worked. The asteroid field had taken care of some of the pilots. Only three were still left following her, and they appeared to be moving as much slower pace than she. She let out a victorious cheer as she looked up once again to the space in front of her.

An asteroid was coming hurling towards her, faster than any that she had seen one move before. Rey veered left, hoping that she would be able to clear the giant boulder in time before it hit her. The asteroid shot past her, but not before grazing the wing of the old shuttle pod. She felt her stomach drop as the wing of her shuttle detached entirely after the impact.

Before Rey could even react, her ship began to spin uncontrollably through the remains of the asteroid field. She was flung across the ship, her right shoulder hitting the steel reinforced ceiling of the shuttle pod. Rey cried out in agony, but there was no one there to hear her. All she could do was let the shuttle tumble through the rest of the asteroid field, and tumble along with it.

Although it seemed like forever, her ship cleared the rest of the asteroid field within minutes. But the ship's spinning did not stop, and she was still barreling towards the unidentified planet below. The spiraling downward continued, and she could feel herself falling and she closed her eyes as she was pulling into the planet's gravitational system. No doubt that the First Order fighters would strike their fatal blows and end her there.

If the impact of her landing did not kill her first.

Her craft was accelerating now, moving faster than ever before now that she was being pulled into the gravitational field of the planet before her.

The impact came before Rey could even prepare for it.

Without so much as warning, Rey's torso hit the steel ceiling of the shuttle pod. Her body was being tossed around like a rag doll, her extremities flailing without any control on her part.

And just like that, it was over and everything went black.

* * *

Rey's eyes flickered open, a move that sent daggers shooting through her retina as the daylight pouring in to the discarded remnants of the shuttle pod blinded her. She groaned as she shut her eyes once more, trying to protect herself from the harsh intrusion of the light. She had no idea how long she had been lying unconscious for. Her mind immediately reeled back to the events that caused her crash landing. There was no doubt that the First Order could have tracked her crash to this vicinity; it was a marvel that they had not found her yet.

She was already operating on lost time; she would have to get moving before anyone else found her.

With a whelp of pain, Rey turned over on her side. Her arms shakily pushed her battered body up into a kneeling position. Rey looked at the remnants of the shuttle pod around her. The emergency lights cast a dim glow around the vessel, signaling that at least the generators were functioning. But a quick assessment of the rest of the ship told her that everything else was far beyond repair. Even with the skills she picked up as a scavenger, it would take a miracle for her to be able to fix this heap.

No, Rey was at the mercy of whoever inhabited the strange planet she was on.

It would do her well to know the planet, and its inhabitants, before she set out to find a new means of transport. Rey looked at the crumpled shuttle, silently praying that the ancient computer system survived the crash. With a few quick strokes, Rey tapped into the central computer's navigational system. She sighed in relief as her coordinates flickered on the cracked computer screen.

 _Region: Outer Rim_

 _System: Opoku_

 _Planet: Gamorr_

Rey's brow furrowed as it dawned on her that she had never heard of the planet, or its people before. Her shoulders collapsed as she realized that she did not have fortune on her side. Rey transferred the coordinates and codex on the planet to her holopad, and strapped it securely onto her brown utility belt as she exited the shuttle. There was no telling when she would need it again.

Rey grabbed her travel sack, a smile etching itself on her face as she realized her meager belongings survived the crash. But she would need more than just her small possessions if she was going to survive her desertion on such a world. She began to tear the already destroyed ship to pieces, ripping out any scrap metal that she could use to trade for money to help buy her a ship, or passage to a more inhabited planet. She peeled the protective hull back to reveal the engine of the ship, and Rey grabbed what she could carry. Her hands worked quickly and carefully, eager to be engaging in a skill they mastered at such a young age. The ship's groaned as they shut off as Rey carefully ripped the system out. That part, in particular, would give her a nice bounty on any planet.

When Rey was satisfied that she had scavenged enough of her old ship, she turned back and set out. The fumbled for the codex in her now packed satchel, searching the database for the nearest town or trading outpost. She peered at the world around her; the area around her seemed to be a grassy plain. Her eyes narrowed in the distance, if her navigational system brought her that way, there was a tree line was waiting kilometers away to shield her from the hot sun.

Not long after her navigation system showed her the way, Rey began her half day's trek to Jugsmuk Station.

The sun was setting in the sky as she reached the dusty settlement. The Gamorreans seemed to keep their head down as they packed up their shops for the day. Rey scurried in to the settlement, desperate to find someone who could help her trade her parts for transport.

Rey hurried to the side of the first person she saw, standing outside of a post that looked eerily similar to the one belonging to Unkar Plutt back on Jakku. The Gamorrean standing guard at the post regarded Rey skeptically. But Rey raised her chin; she was the former padawan of Luke Skywalker, and had survived in the wasteland that was Niima Outpost for years. She would not be intimidated out of a trade.

Silently, Rey emptied the contents of her satchel, one by one. The Gamorrean trader eyed her carefully as she placed her bounty in front of him. When she was finished, he looked at the heaps of scrap parts placed in front of him, his bottom lip protruding with surprise at the bounty in front of him. The seconds dragged before he finally spoke, "I can give you seven thousand credits for these parts."

"Seven thousand?" Rey looked up at the trader before her, incredulous at the offer. "These parts together should be worth at least double that, if not more!"

But her protests were lost on the Gamorrean, he shrugged before turning back to his own work and leaving Rey with a decision to make. The former huffed, she needed the credits desperately if she was going to find a way off of the planet. Seven thousand was not enough for her to buy her own ship that could fly to Moraband. But perhaps she could hire someone to fly her to Moraband. It was not ideal, but it was infinitely better than being stranded on this strange planet for any longer than she needed to be.

"I'll take the seven thousand," Rey called out to the trader. He turned, offering her an expression that she supposed resembled a smile. Rey watched carefully as the man counted the credits he was to give her; she could not afford to be shortchanged by some swindler hoping to score a good deal. When both Rey and the trader were satisfied with their transaction, Rey turned in search of the station's nearest cantina. Surely there would be some seedy characters willing to take her to her destination.

Her eyes narrowed as scanned Jugsmuk Station, adjusting to the harsh light of the setting sun. But they widened as they fell upon the glistening white armor belonging to a pair of storm troopers.

"Kriff," Rey mumbled to herself. She tucked her chin, keeping her head both low and out of sight. Her eyes followed the twin troopers carefully. Her feet remained firmly in their place; she dared not draw attention to herself by making a run for it. She watched as the pair made their way from trading posts to shops, grabbing proprietors by their collars. Shop owners shook their heads fervently before being carelessly discarded when the troopers did not get what they wanted.

"Hey, you." The muffled voices of the troopers were eerily close to her now; she could hear them perfectly without straining herself. She watched as the troopers interrogated the Gamorrean trader she had just dealt with. "A shuttle crashed a few miles back. Have you seen anything out of the ordinary?"

Without uttering so much as a word, the trader's eyes moved towards Rey's direction. The troopers followed the Gamorrean's gaze, which landed squarely on Rey. Without another word, the troopers began marching towards her, their blasters already drawn and ready to attack.

Rey turned, wishing she had the blue lightsaber attached to her utility belt. But, as she left the weapon on Ahch-To, Rey had no choice but to turn on her heels and run. She had no weapon to fight the troopers, and could only evade them. As she pushed past the few remaining stragglers in the open air market, she seized on the opportunity to put some distance between her and her pursuers. She leaped over a table displaying the local produce, and kicked it back after she cleared the obstacle. Fruits of all kinds rolled towards the storm troopers, and the pair fumbled over the new hurdle as they tried to keep pace with Rey.

They were quick for troopers, Rey thought as she looked over her shoulders and saw that they were gaining on her. She would not be able to outrun them, but she may be able to outsmart them. Instantly, Rey changed directions and turned into a secluded back alley. But she had not outwitted the First Order, as another white clad soldier stood waiting for her. Rey skidded to a stop, her heels digging into the dirt. The storm trooper raised his blaster to her, ready to fire at any given moment. The trooper's muffled voice commanded, "Put your hands up!"

Rey did as she was told, raising her hands into a non-threatening positions. What she would not give for a weapon, she thought as her chest heaved from the exertion. She would be able to end this now.

Rey looked at the blaster in her enemy's hand, willing herself to have it. She called for it through the Force. She could feel the air changing around her, the space between herself and her desired weapon closing in on itself. Soon enough, the blaster flew from the storm troopers hand and into hers. Rey immediately turned it on the trooper and fired a deadly blast straight at his chest.

The commotion was enough to signal to the other storm troopers Rey's location, and soon she found herself surrounded by the enemy. She had to act; without so much as a word, Rey sprang into action. She lunged forward at the first trooper, while pointing the blaster at the other in the opposite direction. Rey kicked the trooper who was charging at her, sending him reeling back into the main thoroughfare of the markets. She turned to the trooper that she had fired at, disappointed to realize that her shot had missed. Now, the trooper has his own weapon pointed towards her. Without any warning, the trooper fired the weapon.

Rey veered left as a beam of light from the blaster headed straight for her, her body rolling as she tried to dodge it. But before she could fully clear the assault, her arm began to burn. She cried out in pain as she realized she had been hit. The trooper took that opportunity to move towards her once again. Rey cried out as her blaster had been kicked from her hands and the trooper stomped down on her wrist. The full weight of the trooper bore down on her left wrist, causing what Rey was absolutely sure was fracture. Using her free hand, Rey tried to offset the enemy's balance. But it was no use.

Within moments, the back alley of the Gamorrean market was swarming with additional troopers. A series of blasters remained pointed directly at Rey as her hands were bound. Rey tried to focus on anything but the pain coming from her shattered wrist, hoping that she would be able to get herself out of the situation. But the incessant throbbing was all consuming.

"It's off to a labor camp for you," One of the troopers chimed, as he guided Rey to the transport shuttle that had appeared at Jugsmuk Station sometime during the commotion. Rey squared her jaw. Perhaps a labor camp would not be the worst thing, she thought as a series of plans already formed in her mind. She would have access to tools and weapons, and it would be much easier to steal a ship on such a camp.

"Not this one," Another muffled voice broke Rey's thoughts. Rey looked over at the nondescript storm trooper, her brow furrowing with confusion, "This one is going straight to General Hux."


	7. Of Hostages and Hosts

**This Awful Energy**

 **Summary** : It was simple: he was shrouded in darkness, and she in light. But when she discovers who she truly is, a new legacy is thrust upon her. Can Rey cope with the truth of her own past?

 **Author's Note** : Well, hello there! Once again, I'm sorry for the delay. I found it very difficult to start this chapter. I also do apologize for the length, I realize it is somewhat short; I was going to extended it but thought better of it. It's not something I feel all too comfortable dragging out. But I have to admit, once I got going with this – it was actually kind of fun to write. Now, I have to say that has me questioning a LOT of things about myself.

Anyway, here is a general warning. **There are multiple scenes of torture in this chapter.**

* * *

 **Chapter Six:** Of Hostages and Hosts

"Where are you taking me?" Rey spat at the storm troopers who had begun manhandling her. But the other trooper's previous words echoed in her mind.

 _This one is going straight to General Hux._

Rey's shattered wrist throbbed violently as a pair of emboldened storm troopers grabbed her by her bound arms and settled her in the pristine transport shuttle. She was thrust into the cold hard seat and her guards connected the bounds on her hands to a chain on the bottom of her seat. Ignoring the pain that radiated through her as she moved, she pulled slightly at the chains but they would not give. Now escape was next to impossible. Each trooper took a position seated at her side, armed and ready to strike should she make any attempt at escape. Rey's eyes quickly scanned the exit of the shuttle, wondering just how in the galaxy she would be able to escape. Even now, a calculation of the odds was forming in her mind. But she was outnumbered, she would not be able to physically overpower them. With her wrist swollen and now unable to move, Rey was completely useless.

The shuttle pod shook as it began to take off.

Rey focused on her injury, pouring all of her concentration to the source of the pain. She had not remained with Luke Skywalker long enough to learn how to mend her own injuries. Perhaps if she could compartmentalize the pain enough to allow for a greater focus, she could hatch some sort of plan.

But for now she focused on the pain, imagining that the radius of pain in her wrist was getting smaller and smaller until…

But Rey never got to finish her exercise. In her concentration, she did not register the storm trooper bringing a syringe up to her neck. Before she could even attempt to fight him off, the needle pierced her skin. Rey's face contorted in pain as thick liquid entered into her system. Almost immediately, her skin grew hot and flushed. Her cheeks burned as the back of her neck grow damp from perspiration. She exhaled deeply, looking to the person who had injected her for any indication of what was happening.

But the masked man did not give anything away.

"Wha - What was that?" She mumbled, her lips feeling far too heavy to speak properly.

But Rey received no answer from her captors. Her eyes fluttered with their newfound, growing heavier and heavier with each passing second. An unexpected wave of exhaustion crashed over her. Rey fought it with every ounce of strength she had. She was determined to remain alert and awake.

But the drug was far too powerful. Rey felt herself slipping farther and farther into the unknown, until she was no longer conscious of the world around her.

* * *

When Rey finally emerged from that dark unknown, she could hear the world around her before she could actually see it.

As she slowly drifted back into a state of consciousness, she could hear the unmistakable low hum of the ship that now carried her. It was distinct from the more brutish noise of the smaller shuttle pod that she had been forced onto earlier – whatever ship she was on was infinitely more elegant.

She could hear the whirring of countless machines around her. It was almost as if they were singing a lullaby, lulling her back into her eerie dreamlike state. But as she listened to their song, Rey noticed that there was the distinct absence of other sounds. There was no shuffling of footsteps, no muted breaths of anyone else around her. She was entirely alone.

Her vision returned to her next. Rey's eyes fluttered open as if she were emerging from the most peaceful of dreams. In truth, she had been at peace before she finally came to. She had seen herself back on Jakku, her skin turning the loveliest shade of golden as she baked in the desert sun. In her mind, she lay there for hours as the warm and gracious sun gently kissed her skin. She never thought she would miss the harsh heat of the planet, but her solitary life seemed more and more enticing as her life became increasingly more complicated.

But when her eyes finally opened, it was not the welcoming sun on Jakku that greeted her. Rather, the harsh light of an unknown welcomed her back into the world. Her brow furrowed as her eyes adjusted to the bright fluorescent light that illuminated the room. A cloud lifted, the fog over her mind dissipated as memories from the previous day returned to her.

Her crashing landing on a strange planet…

Scavenging parts to survive….

Running from the First Order…

Rey immediately moved to sit up, but she found herself unable to move herself very far. Her former master would have been disappointed in her, as it had taken her this long to become aware of her surroundings. Cold metal restraints bound her to a bare gurney, and she was not free to move about. Her shattered and swollen wrist throbbed within mercilessly against the harsh restraints. As she struggled against them, Rey could not help but think about that last time she had woken up in a room such as this. She had been frightened then, just as she was now. But this time, there was no Kylo Ren to greet her as she woke up.

 _This one is going straight to General Hux._ The cold and hazy memory gripped Rey, sending chills radiating through her spin. She had only vague recollections of the stone faced general, from her last encounter with the First Order on Starkiller Based. Rey gnawed on her bottom lip as she considered what terrifying possibilities waited her here.

She was not left waiting in suspense for her answer very long.

Rey had not been awake for more than ten minutes when gliding doors of the holding chamber slid open. A copper haired general – _Hux,_ Rey thought – entered the room, flanked by two pristine looking storm troopers.

Moments passed agonizingly slow, as the general regarded her stoically. Rey matched his expression perfectly, pursing her lips together into a thin line of disdain until they almost disappeared entirely.

"What is a scavenger from Jakku," The general spat out the name of her former planet with such a fiery disdain, "doing this far along the Outer Rim?"

Her expression did not change, and she made no effort to answer his question. She merely started at him, her eyes boring deep and defiantly into his.

"Did the Jedi, Luke Skywalker, send you here?" Her probed as he took a step closer to where she was strapped down. Her heat began to beat more rapidly, and as she considered what he could possibly do to her. But she only regarded him coolly; she would not dignify him with any sort of response. Hux's face contorted in anger at her non answer. His voice harder this time, the general repeated his question, "Did Luke Skywalker send you here?"

Again, Rey did not give him any response.

The general snarled, and with one fluid motion, grabbed Rey's swollen wrist and twisted it harshly to one side. Rey cried out at the unexpected pain. Hux moved so that he was next to her. She could feel his breath snake around her skin as he hissed into her ear, "Where is Luke Skywalker?"

Rey gritted her teeth, refusing to betray any information to the man before her. She was breathing deeply through her nose, trying to manage the burning of her injured wrist while refusing to give Hux the satisfaction of seeing her cry out again. This time, she was ready for the pain as Hux bent her injury back into an unnatural position. It hurt like hell, and Rey wanted nothing more than to scream and lash out at the general. But she would not give him that satisfaction.

Just as she would not give him the information he was looking for.

Rey's eyes flickered over to her injured wrist; it had now doubled its original size and turned an unsightly purple color. Hux seemed to notice her brief examination of the injury. His lips pursed together in what could only be considered a smirk as he mused, "That looks quite unfortunate."

"Go to hell," Rey snarled, her emotions finally getting the better of her.

Something resembling a laugh escaped her captor's throat, "The desert rat finally speaks. Tell me where the Jedi is, _scavenger_ , and I will see that your injuries are tended to."

She did not respond, but shut her eyes as she tried to will away the excruciating pain in her wrist. There was no use now, as her injuries were far too severe. Hux seemed to enjoy her reaction. Tilting his head to one side, he remarked, "If you do not tell me where the Jedi is, I can do much worse than break your hand. I can do this for as long as I need to. _Tell me, and no more harm shall come to you._ "

Breathing out through her nose, Rey only repeated, "Go to hell."

Rey could not find the words to describe the fury in the general's eyes. But along with the anger, the repulsion, that were so clearly etched into his expression, there was also a mix of excitement. With only the flick of a single finger, the general signaled to the troopers as his side. Out of the corner of her eye, Rey could see the sentinel open the sliding door.

Rey gasped as an interrogator droid whirred into the room, it many parts and probes chiming as it migrated closer to the gurney. Rey looked at each removable part on the orb-like droid, curious as to what terror it could cause her. The droid seemed to spring to life at that moment, and Rey could already hear the distinct and faint hum of an electrical current coming from the tool. Rey chewed the bottom of her lip, biting down harder as the current touched her skin. The brief tingle shot up the side of her abdomen, radiating pain as the electrical pulse transformed from mere ticklish to excruciating. Rey violently writhed in her bound position on the gurney as a blood curdling scream escaped her throat.

As her cry finally subsided, Rey noticed the slick coppery wetness that coated her tongue and teeth. In her pain, she had bitten too hard on her lip and caused considerable bleeding. She swirled the blood in her mouth, hardening her resolve against the cruel general.

"Where is the Jedi?" The question came from somewhere behind her. She watched as the general circled her once before finally meeting her at eye level, "Tell me where he is!"

Rey inhaled sharply before releasing her fury on the general before her. Without giving any hint of action, she spit directly in Hux's face. A mix of blood and her saliva now coated his forehead, unceremoniously sliding down towards his brow. Hux, for his part, seemed shocked at Rey's audacity. But any surprised quickly vanished as anger once again etched his features. With one fluid motion, the back of his hand struck her harshly across her cheek.

The sting of his hand burned her skin, and she could feel the heat rising to the spot where he had struck her. But, in truth, the pain was nothing compared to what the rest of her body felt. Her muscles gave out when the electrical current had radiated through her system, and she felt herself physically weaken after the contact. A mere slap was nothing compared to that.

At the general's command, the droid moved closer to her. The hum of the electrical current that pulsed throughout the torture device was back, and Rey struggled against her restraints. But it was futile to try and escape. As the droid inched closer, she could have sworn that she saw the corners of Hux's mouth turn upward in a smile. _How sadistic. He's actually enjoying this._ Rey thought, _I do not think I have ever met a more disturbed -_

But her train of through was interrupted by the jamming of the electric probe once again into her abdomen. Before she could restrain herself, a cry escaped her lips. Shock rippled throughout her body, and she could no longer make sense of what was happening to her.

 _Luke Skywalker…._

 _Moraband…_

Words and images flashed in her mind, but they no longer made any sense to her. Rey struggled to find anything to hold on to, anything to keep her centered as she tried to withstand the incessant flow of electricity and agony. She closed her eyes, hoping that she could fixate on something other than her own anguish.

 _The Force…_

 _General Hux…_

 _Marka Ragnos…_

But trying to hold on to her thoughts was like trying to catch the wind. She found her mind begin to slip, her fleeting thoughts disappearing entirely. She hazily opened her eyes, as if the fluttering of her lids took far too much energy. Her gaze landed on the general and his droid, and she tried to choke out a plea for mercy. But no sound came out of her dry throat. At the general's command, the interrogator droid moved closer to her once more, ready to strike.

* * *

Rey did not know how long she lasted in the interrogation chamber before she finally lost consciousness. But she did know that one moment she was being questioned by the copper haired general, the droid anxiously waiting to fulfill its purpose, and the next, she was waking in an entirely different room. When Rey finally opened her eyes, her mind registering what happened – _hours? days?_ – before, she initially panicked that it would immediately happen again.

But she was relieved to find that she was alone, and she was no longer restrained. She peered around the room. With the exception of her bare cot, her room was basically empty. A door to the cell stood across the room, but there were no controls on the inside. A small tray, with only a small cup of water and what looked like one eighth of a portion of rations, lay carefully placed on the floor next to her. Careful not to put any weight on her injured arm, Rey dove for the portion of food. Her throat was dry, and her lips were cracked from dehydration. Without any hesitation, she downed the water in two large gulps. Immediately though, she wished that she had more. She turned to the food next, using her fingers to greedily shovel the tasteless portion into her mouth. She ate sloppily, and when there not enough left to spoon out, she brought the bowl to her lips, and licked any lingering remnants of the gruel, hoping to satisfy her still grumbling stomach. All too soon, her meager meal was over.

At least the edge of her hunger and thirst curbed. She was, at the very least, no longer ravenous. A wave of exhaustion washed over her. She had apparently not rested at all, despite her unconscious state. An involuntary yawn escaped her lips, and she shifted around on her austere cot to get comfortable. She did not like the idea of letting her guard down enough to sleep while she was held by the First Order, but the wave of exhaustion was almost too much bare.

As if on cue, the overhead lights in her small cell began to dim…

Rey started to wonder if the entire ship was on a timer to regulate night and daytime hours for the crew. But she could not find the energy to give it very much thought. Despite the immense pain in her arm and all over her body, Rey could not fight off the exhaustion. Her eyelids began to flutter closed once more, and she found herself drifting into sleep's welcoming arms…

Only seconds later, a piercing screech broke Rey from her restful reverie. Her eyes shot open at the squawking noise, which sounded all too much like an intruder alert. The lights in her cell, dim only moments before, began to flash brightly. _What is happening?_ Instinctively, unthinkingly, Rey propped herself up to get a better handle on the situation and be ready if anything came through that door for her.

She almost immediately regretted the action as a sharp pain shot through her swollen wrist and radiated through her arm. Rey cried out, but the sound of it was lost amidst the deafening alarm. Her eyes were wide, and her heart was beating rapidly with a mix of adrenaline and pain. She was desperate for something – _anything_ – to happen. Rey could only sit in her cell, helpless as something happened just beyond her door.

But just as suddenly as the alarm had sounded, it stopped.

Rey blinked around her cell, curious as to what had just happened. She eyed the door cautiously, as she half expected someone to burst through the door at any moment.

But no one came.

Rey did not know how long she waited there, staring mindlessly at the door. Seconds, even hours, could have passed for all that she knew. Her concept of time seemed to fade as her exhaustion mounted. Her heart rate finally began to slow down, and she could breathe at a normal pace. Once again, she could feel the temptation of sleep gently pull her down…

And just as she reached that blissful state of sleep, a combination of the screeching alarm and flashing lights violently pulled her awake. Her heart rate jolted up, and her eye widened expectantly. She stood up this time, the adrenaline that coursed through her veins refusing to let her sit. She paced around the room idly until she found herself at the door. With her good arm, she banged on the heavily reinforced doors, hoping that some poor storm trooper would take pity on her and let her know what in the galaxy could possibly be going on.

But all of her attempts were in vain, and she was left on her own until the sound of the alarm abruptly stopped.

Rey slumped once again onto her cot, frustrated by a lack of both knowledge and sleep.

When she was satisfied that once again no one would come into her room, she began to drift off to sleep…

Until the sound of the alarms started up again…

* * *

Hour passed, and Rey could count on her hands the number of minutes of rest she achieved that night. It was evident after the first couple of cycles that the sound of the alarm meant nothing other than to deprive Rey of some much needed sleep. She tried to remain awake, to use the meditation that Luke had taught her to drown every distraction out. But it was no use, she was far too exhausted to self-regulate. Exhaustion pulled at her, but she was never given even a moment's rest while she was held captive.

She ached all over, and her weakened muscles were never given the proper opportunity to heal that came with a good night's rest. Her once aching arm was all but numb, although it turned a deep black color overnight. Rey was sure that the shattered wrist was infected now. She had seen similar injuries in other scavengers back on Jakku – without treatment, the infection would spread to her blood stream and poison her.

Without any help, Rey was going to die.

And so Rey sat, contemplating the idea of her impending death when she heard the door to her cell slide open. She was unsure of what time it was when the storm troopers came and fetched her. Grabbing her arms, they dragged her from her cell and through the empty hall of the starship. Rey had no energy to put up a fight, until she saw that they were dragging her back into the cold interrogation chamber. As they entered the room, Rey could only hazily make out a newly erected tank in the corner of the room. A small part of her knew she should be worried, but she did not have the energy to occupy herself with more than one thought.

"No –" Rey weakly protested, trying to resist as the troopers clumsily locked her into the gurney again. The idea of fighting back flickered momentarily across her mind. But the troopers easily overpowered her, as she lacked any energy to properly fight them off. The storm troopers only chuckled at her pitiful attempts as escape before they secured the restraints and took their posts at the door.

Almost immediately as she was secured, General Hux entered the interrogation chamber followed by another interrogation droid. Without any greeting or introduction, the cruel officer demanded, "Tell me, scavenger rat, where is Luke Skywalker?"

The only sound that crossed Rey's lips was the groan of exhaustion. Her body was not her own anymore; a sensation of numbness swept over her. The general, however, seemed once again displeased with her non-answer. His lips pursed into a thin line, and he motioned to the troopers, "Prepare the bacta chamber."

Rey's eyes involuntarily raised when she heard the words come out of the general's mouth. She did not quite believe it. She watched as the storm troopers prepared what appeared to be a small tub filled with the healing gel. As she was watching the storm troopers, however, General Hux was eyeing her. He seemed to notice the sense of relief that flooded over her, and he smiled. He took a small step towards her, "Do you know what the bacta tank is for, scavenger? You'll be placed in the chamber, and all of your ailments will slowly begin to heal. And that is when an electrical current will be passed through the tank."

Rey's mouth hung agape at the general's callous explanation as to what would be done to her. That would be enough to kill her.

"You won't die," Hux mused, as if he could read her thoughts. His previous scowl turned upward into a sadistic smile, "You will beg for death, of course. But the bacta gel will keep you alive, so that the process will begin all over again. That is, of course, you tell me the location of Luke Skywalker."

And then Hux let out a small chuckle.

 _A chuckle._

A wave of absolute repulsion washed over her. No, she decided almost immediately, it was not repulsion. Rey felt something much stronger for the red headed general that stood before her. _Hatred._

A memory, coming from somewhere in the depths of her mind, wisped into her thoughts. She could vaguely recall Luke having said something about hatred being the antithesis of the Jedi Code. But she could not help herself. What kind of man would take such pleasure out of the unyielding and barbaric torture of someone else?

No, Rey most definitely hated General Hux.

Upon that realization, Rey felt as if energy had once again returned to her body. Where she had once been weak, Rey now gathered strength. It was her indignation - her hatred of the man before her - that powered her now.

The general moved towards her, ready to begin the barbaric interrogation technique that he enjoyed so much. He was still laughing to himself, and Rey could see the bob of his Adam's apple as he laughed. A part of her wanted to crush it, to prevent him from ever laughing at her expense ever again. Rey involuntarily clenched her hand into a fist at the thought of it.

 _It would be so sweet to give him a taste of his own medicine._

A small coughing sound interrupted Rey's thoughts. She looked to the general, who seemed to be grabbing his throat. He seemed to be trying to pry invisible hands from his throat. Rey watched, a mixture of both horror and awe, as Hux futilely gasped for air. _Retribution,_ she mused to herself from her spot on the gurney.

The storm troopers who were standing guard rushed to the aid of their commander, hoping to find the source of his ailment. It almost made Rey laugh at how helpless all of them looked, just like she had been hours ago.

"Please," Hux managed to choke out. He looked to Rey, his blue eyes pleading with her, as if she had the power to release him from his misery.

Rey blinked for a moment. Could she be the cause of this?

Her eyes trailed from the choking general to her own clenched fist. Her knuckles had turned white, and she could feel her nails pressing deep into the skin of her palm. She had not released she had been clenching her fist so tightly. It was only then that she became aware of the power radiating through her. _The Force._ Rey _did_ have the power to stop this madness.

But did she want to?

She thought of the past few days, of being locked up and sleep deprived to the point of pure exhaustion. Hux's sadistic laugh echoed in her mind. The thought alone sent her once again reeling. And Rey had her answer.

She definitely _did not_ want to stop this.

If at all possible, the invisible hold on Hux's throat seemed to grow tighter. The pathetic sputtering sound of his gasps for air ceased entirely. Slowly, the general's face began to change from its health pink color to a more putrid looking purple.

But all Rey could hear was the echo of the general's small laugh.

Purple turned to blue, and the general's movements on the floor of the interrogation chamber became more sporadic, more volatile. His eyes were closed, and a small part of Rey wondered just how close the man was to death. Rey blinked, momentarily surprised by the cruelty of her own thought.

 _Hatred is the path to the dark side._ The words surfaced from her memory, from a conversation she had ages ago with her master. Rey had been telling Luke one day about her childhood, when she professed hatred for Unkar Plutt and the way that he had treated her. _Do not give in to your emotions._

The words echoed in her mind, and Rey emerged from the haze of hatred like a child from the fog. A wave of guilt washed over her as she realized what exactly she had done. She released her clenched fist and watched the general carefully for any signs of life. But the man with the still blue face did not move. One trooper knelt by his commander, trying to revive him. The other turned his blaster towards her, "What did you do, scavenger?"

"I-"

But Rey did not have any opportunity to defend herself as the doors to the interrogation chamber opened before she could respond. A masked figure, clad in all black, briskly and purposefully entered the room. Despite the opaque helmet, Rey felt eyes behind it boring deep into her.

"Why was I not informed of the capture of this prisoner?" Kylo Ren asked, his voice distorted from behind the mask. He turned towards the storm trooper with the blaster aimed at Rey, "Under whose orders was this information kept from me?"

"General Hux demanded that she be brought directly to him, sir," The trooper explained. "But she managed –"

It was only then that Kylo Ren turned his gaze towards the crumpled heap on the floor. But before the storm trooper could finish his sentence, the knight turned back towards Rey, "You did this?"

Rey nodded once, scared to admit to any more than that. She had seen – had been on the receiving end – of Kylo Ren's power. She did not know what he would do to her as a punishment.

"Why does she look like that?" The mechanical voice posed the question to the storm trooper. Rey swallowed, although the action was painful. Now that her adrenaline rush had ended, the pain returned to her in full force. She could only imagine what she looked like after days of no sleep and being half-beaten.

"The general thought it best to interrogate her on the whereabouts of the Jedi, sir."

Kylo Ren did not say anything other than, "Take our guest into the medical bay. I want the droids to look at her arm."

"Yes sir," One of the troopers responded as he began to remove the metal restraints that had bound Rey. For the briefest of moments, Rey contemplated fighting – running – anything that would help her to get away. But she was still very weak, and she would not make it far with Kylo Ren on her tail. Even as she was removed from the restraints, she could find she could not walk far without any support. The storm trooper to her left guided her, and she had no choice but to rely on him.

Rey let the storm trooper lead her out of the room. But as the doors slid closed behind them, she swore he could hear the sound of a lightsaber violently striking the bacta chamber.

* * *

 **Author's Note:** Well, there we are! We finally have Rey and Kylo in the same room!


	8. Prisoner

**This Awful Energy**

 **Summary** : It was simple: he was shrouded in darkness, and she in light. But when she discovers who she truly is, a new legacy is thrust upon her. Can Rey cope with the truth of her own past?

 **Author's Note** : I am SO SORRY. I know I have been sucky an MIA for God knows how long. The only thing I can say was that work has been absolutely kicking my ass and I haven't been able to do much for myself lately. But I want you to know that I have never forgotten about this story – and I'm writing more and more as I prepare for The Last Jedi to come out.

With that being said, I won't hold off any longer. Here is Chapter 7!

Please review and let me know what you think!

* * *

 **Chapter Seven: Prisoners**

Rey watched carefully as the medical droid assigned to her meticulously wrapped up her still swollen arm in a delicate bandage.

Although she was absolutely exhausted, the hours of sleep deprivation taking its toll on her, Rey would not allow herself to rest. Rest meant that she was letting her guard down, and she did not trust the people on the destroyer enough to let her guard down. And the sight of another bacta-chamber in the medical bay was enough to send her into a fit. It took a series of droids and a doctor to calm her, to reassure her that this was not just one of the First Order's elaborate torture plans to give her a glimmer of hope only to rip it away violently at the last possible moment.

But the moment never came.

Rey watched as the droid tended to all of her injuries, rubbing a cooling bacta-gel on her inflamed and torn skin. It soothed almost instantly, and she already felt better than she had in days.

Aside from the team of droids and single medic, there was no one else in the medical bay. It was quiet, and no words were exchanged after Rey's outburst at the sight of the bacta-chamber. Despite the silence, Rey could hear everything just outside of the medical bay doors. And when the door opened halfway through her treatment, Rey' heartbeat began to pick up. Could it be a revived General Hux, come for revenge? Or a murderous Kylo Ren?

But when the doors parted to reveal nothing more than an unassuming droid, Rey let out a breath she had not realized she had been holding. Her tension eased even more as her eyes fell on what the droid was carrying.

In its hand was a tray, and on that tray was enough food to make her mouth water. It was by no mean elaborate or luxurious, but Rey did not realize how hungry she actually was. The broth and a sweet smelling rolls on the tray were more than she had in a very long time. When the delectable food was placed directly in front of her, she immediately picked up the bowl, ready to down all of its contents

The medical droid, however, scolded her, "If you eat too fast, you will make yourself sick."

The machine reached across Rey's tray, picked up a small spoon and held it out to Rey. She eyed it, before grudgingly snatching it from her caretaker and using it to shovel the warm broth inside of her mouth. All the while, Rey glared at the droid in front of her.

As Rey ate what was placed in front of her, she noticed her reflection in the chrome exterior of the surrounding medical equipment. She startled at her appearance; the droids attempted to clean her up as they attended to her wounds. But Rey truly looked horrible.

Her skin was pale white, only to be complemented by dark puffy circles underneath her eyes from her sleepless night. Her hair was matted down to her head in a sticky and stringy mess. She looked like death.

 _After all I've been through, I'm not surprised,_ Rey thought as she popped a small piece of seedy bread into her mouth. She chewed thoughtfully as she contemplated her situation – how she arrived at this point. How she must have appeared – tired and crazed – when Kylo Ren interrupted her. Or did he _save_ her?

Rey shuddered as the rage that had filled her up and clouded her judgment only hours ago. Deep down, she knew that she should have been better than that. More controlled. Kylo Ren walked in at her lowest – _or her highest?_ – point. She had let her rage at General Hux guide her actions.

She thought about the copper-haired general – about his leering presence and sadistic tendencies. Even now she could close her eyes and easily see his smirking face that relished in her pain.

And she hated him for it.

But she had not wanted to kill him.

That had never been her intention.

Had she killed him? Rey as not even sure of that. Kylo had ordered her whisked away from the interrogation chamber so quickly that she could not determine if the general was still breathing or not.

Rey looked at her reflection again. Was this the reflection of a killer? She shook her head, she had acted purely in self-defense. Hux would have gladly tortured her – perhaps even killed her - if he had been given the chance.

But that did not erase the enjoyment and satisfaction she received from watching him helplessly squirm on and writhe in agony. A knot formed in the pit of her stomach – _you are no better than he is._

Her thoughts were interrupted as the medical droid once again appeared at her side. Rey was never alone for more than five minutes, and she was sure that that was done entirely on purpose.

The droid looked at her, no hint of emotion on its' robotic face, "As your wounds now have all been treated, you are being discharged from the medical wing. You will be moved into a private room, where you will be checked daily by medical personnel until it is determined that you are fully healed."

Rey blinked at the droid, processing its words. When the realization finally dawned on her, the knot in her core only tightened. She shook her head; she did not want to be put back into her dark cell, where she would not be able to close her eyes. She refused. Immediately, Rey balled her hands into a fist, ready to fight her way out if necessary.

But the droid either did not see her reaction, or it did not care. Before Rey could let out a word of protest, a protocol droid began lading her down an unfamiliar corridor and bright hallway. Rey watched carefully, paying attention to each turn she took and absorbing all information about the layout of the starship she was on. She may need it again when she planned her inevitable escape attempt.

Along the end of the hall, Rey could see a series of doors, each designated by a series of numbers. The protocol droid paused in front of the last door on the left-hand side, before turning to Rey, "Each apartment door is equipped with a biometric lock to ensure privacy. To get in, all you need to do is place your right palm on the scanner here."

Rey chewed her lip thoughtfully, holding back her question as to who else's handprint the biometric scanner recognized. Surely she could not expect any level of privacy from her captor.

Despite her doubts, she did as the droid instructed and placed her palm directly on the scanner. She could feel the whir of the machine under her touch. A click sounded as the machine recognized her and the door slid open in one graceful motion, revealing her new chamber.

Rey did not know what she truly expected when she was being moved to a new room. Perhaps another cell. Perhaps a small utilitarian barrack or dormitory. But she did not expect the luxury before her. The room she stepped into was larger than anything she had seen before. Her own home on Jakku was nothing compared to the pristine chambers presented to her now. The dark floors glistened and reflected the overhead lights; as she looked down Rey could see her own haggard reflection in the tiles. A small table, enough to seat only two, could be found in the corner of the room with a fine place setting already neatly laid out. A small loveseat decorated the center of the room, and a holopad lay neatly on one of the cushions. To her left, she saw a large bed. She walked over to it, letting her fingers graze over the fine linen sheets.

No, this was not the cell she had been expecting at all.

 _It is still a prison._ The thought came unbidden, and made her shift uncomfortably.

"A shower and bathroom are just through those doors," The protocol droid interrupted her thoughts, "For your convenience."

Rey nodded her gratitude towards the droid, unable to find her voice.

"If you should need assistance," The machine continued, "You may press any of the call buttons here." The droid indicated a small touchpad on the wall.

Rey bit her lip as she eyed the device; she would not be around long enough for her to need that particular amenity.

It was only a few more minutes before the droid, convinced that Rey was settled into her new chambers, left her to her own thoughts. Already, her mind was swimming with the logistics surrounding any potential escape plan. She was absolutely sure that she was being watched, or guarded. They would expect her to escape. She needed time to work out a plan, to figure out how this was doing to work.

She needed time.

And there were also other pressing matters for her to attend to. Although she had been cleaned up in the medical bay, her open wounds disinfected and stitched, Rey still felt the need to wash and get out of the clothes that reeked of blood and sweat. Curious, she opened the chrome dressing table beside the bed she had been given. She had ample garments to choose from, but Rey grabbed the first thing that she had seen. After pulling out the change of clothes, she proceeded into the washroom.

Stepping into the shower, she allowed the hot water to scald her skin as it rinsed away the grime that had accumulated. She relished the pain of the hot droplets searing everything away. She scrubbed her skin, lathering soap to wash away all of the dirt and grime that seemed to stick to her since she had left Ahch-To. She washed away all of the main, the guilt, and the memories from the last few days.

Rey wanted to forget everything that had happened over the course of the last week. She scrubbed harder, as if doing so would rid her of the anger that welled inside of her when she thought about what she learned in regards to her own family. She scrubbed as if it would help her escape the horrible memories of torture. She tried, in vain, to cleanse herself of the guilt that surrounded her actions towards General Hux.

She scrubbed until her skin was red and raw.

But her thoughts would not be ignored, and they drifted cruelly back to the red headed general. When she closed her eyes, she could easily picture him lying in that crumbled heap on the floor. Her throat dried as the possibility that she had killed him crossed her mind.

Rey scrubbed her skin even harder, wishing all of her ill thoughts away.

When Rey finally emerged from the shower, she already felt better than she had in days. Her dark hair was no longer matter down to her top of her head, and her senses were much more awake and alert. Grabbing the clothes that she picked out previously, Rey quickly changed. The long black leggings she had chosen were not entirely was she was used to- she had always been inclined to a looser fit - but she was pleasantly surprised by their comfort and the range of motion. The gray tunic she had chosen was loose fitting, draping down gently to her hips, with a neckline that plunged a little too low for her liking. Somehow, she thought, she would feel uncomfortable no matter what she had chosen to wear.

Looking at herself in the glass mirror, Rey ran her fingers through her loose hair in an attempt to comb it out. She let the tendrils fall at the nape of her neck as they formed gentle curls.

She exited the washroom once satisfied with her appearance, ready to tackle the feat if escaping the First Order once more.

Or, so she thought.

She immediately sensed something odd – something _familiar_ once she entered the main quarters once more. The small hairs on her arm stood as the recognized the familiar feeling that once haunted her dreams. Something she had not truly felt in a long ,. _No, it couldn't be._ Her stomach dropped as she saw a figure sitting casually in a chair at the dining table. Rey bristled, the tiny hairs on the back of her neck standing to attention. What was _he_ doing here? Her breath hitched in her throat, and her hand balled into a fist as she took a cautious step toward him.

She had no weapons, no way of saving herself from this man. This _monster._

He may have saved her, but they were absolutely not on the same side.

As Rey neared Kylo Ren, he finally turned to face her. His mask lay carefully placed on the table, and she could watch as his eyes studied her. Rey swallowed a lump in her throat as his eyes fell to her bandaged arm. It remained wrapped tightly, but the way he looked at it, it was as if he could see every horridly infected detail of her shattered wrist.

"How are you feeling?" His unexpected words broke the uncomfortable silence between them.

Rey wet her lips, hoping that she sounded much more confident than she felt. She met his gaze before replying dryly "I have been better."

He nodded, as if that was the answer he was expecting. Rey had to wonder if could sense what she was feeling through their bond. If he even was aware of it. Rey was so consumed with thoughts of their supposed Force bond that she did not even notice him gesture to the place setting in front of him. Until now, Rey had not even noticed the food laid out on the table.

So much for her heightened Jedi senses.

"I would like you to join me for dinner."

A viscous retort lodged itself in her throat. She could already think of a witty remark about the audacity of show up unannounced in _her_ ne private chambers, food in hand, with an invitation. No, it was a demand. But she bit back her sarcastic remark; she was truly in no position to argue with him.

Rey eyed Kylo Ren carefully before glancing at the food laid out in front of him. The elegant looking meal most of which she could not recognize, called to her with its sweet aroma. The grumble that erupted from her stomach seemed to answer his request for her. His lips pursed together, curling upward into a half smile that made Rey's insides writhe in unease.

Could she trust him? The answer was obvious. But despite every instinct that told her to run the other way, she pulled out the chair opposite him and sat down.

He picked up a glass before him, raising it to his lips to drink. Rey eyed the man carefully, skeptically, as he set the cup down and asked, "Our reports said that you were picked up in the far end of the Outer Rim. What brings you this far out all by yourself?"

Perhaps she was too used to the harsh questioning nature of General Hux, but the casual nature in which the question was posed to her was unsettling to say the least. Rey reached out to the glass before her, bringing its contents to her lips and delaying her response to his question.

Kylo Ren raised his eyebrows, and Rey bristled as she lowered the cup, "If you wanted to interrogate me, you'd have more luck if you put me back in the interrogation chamber." Her words came out much fiercer than she had actually felt, and for that Rey was grateful.

"You aren't a prisoner here," His tone, while not at all comforting, was very matter of fact.

But she did not believe him – she could not.

Kylo Ren eyed her carefully. Rey shuffled under his gaze as he regarded her, "You're running from something."

She lifted her head, meeting his gaze once more. How had he known that? There could have only been one explanation for it – the force bond -, and Rey gritted her teeth at the thought. So, he was aware of their shared connection. Anger was once again bubbling up inside of her as she slammed her hand down on the table. Through her teeth, Rey snarled, "Get out of my head."

Her captor let out a half-chuckle, although the remnant of his smirk had all but disappeared from his features. "I was doing no such thing. I do not have to; it was written all over your face."

His words hit Rey like a slap in the face, "Do not pretend to know the first thing about me."

His lips pursed tightly together, "I do not have to pretend, Rey. I don't believe that you and I are very different."

"You and I are absolutely _nothing_ alike," There was no hiding the repulsion in her voice at the comparison. "I would _never_ murder my own father, someone who had done nothing but care about you."

Her captor's head shot up at the comment, his eyes flashed in a rage that Rey had not anticipated. He forcefully stood up, the chair tumbling backward as he did so. As the clash of the falling furniture sounded throughout the room, he marched towards Rey. For a moment, Rey was worried that Kylo Ren was about to strike. Her false sense of bravado evaporated as he stared at her intensely, his chest rising and falling rapidly in his anger. Would he lash out at her?

Seconds passed, but they felt like hours. Rey could hear the thudding of her heart, and she had to wonder if the man before her could sense her fear. Even with her heightened senses and training, she could not predict with confidence what Kylo Ren's next move would be. Would he strike? Would he merely leave?

After a few more moments under his frightening gaze, Kylo turned from her. Rey watched behind him, and Rey exhaled as she realized that she was alone. Her shoulders slumped in relief. Looking at the table of uneaten food, Rey felt her appetite disappear.

She sighed and stood up from her position at the table. Running her fingers through her hair, she contemplated what exactly had just happened between her and her adversary. How dare he compare the two of them? She made her way over to the bed, her body collapsing onto the meticulous sheets as she groaned in frustration.

She did not know how long she lay there with her stomach flat on the bed, staring at the wall as she wondered what exactly she was to do next. She was absolutely not returning to Luke Skywalker, and she doubted she could face the Resistance. Her only two options were to continue on her original path to the planet Moraband, or she would remain a prisoner of the First Order.

" _You aren't a prisoner here."_ Kylo Ren's words echoed in her mind. But if she wasn't a hostage, then what was she?

There was only one way to find out.

She swung herself from the bed, the cold floor sending chills from her bare feet to her spine. Although she was alone in her new apartments, she tiptoed across the floor as if she were frightened a noise would alert anyone to her plan. Rey found herself staring at the shut door to her chamber, wondering what would happen if she attempted to open it. Would alarms sound? Would storm troopers surround her immediately?

 _Well, there is only one way to find out._ Rey bit the bottom of her lip, her hand hovering over the biometric door lock. Slowly, she lowered it and felt the sensors kiss her palm.

The door opened without ceremony, and an empty hallway was the only thing that greeted her.

Kylo Ren's assertion of her status on the ship once again crossed her mind. Perhaps he had truly meant it when he has said she was not a prisoner.

At least it would be that much easier to escape.

Rey walked carefully down the hall of the ship, turning corners quickly and carefully as she did so. The last thing that she wanted to do was draw negative attention to herself. She managed to successful navigate a few hundred yards before she heard the sound of boots stomping in her direction. Rey's eyes quickly scanned her surroundings, looking for a place for her to hide.

They landed on a small vent in the corner of the room. Swiftly, Rey kicked out the metal grate of the vent before crawling into the small space. She had just replaced the grate when she could hear the boots of the sentinels approaching.

"The terrorist fighters have all been taken care of," She could her one of the troopers address his comrade. "An entire garrison was completely wiped out in the Eldurian system."

"Good," The other replied, "The more dead rebels there are, the better."

"With the new models of F15s that just arrived yesterday, they do not stand a chance."

Rey felt a boiling in her gut at the storm troopers words. It took every ounce of training she had ever received to fight the pure instinct to attack the foot soldier for his words. She thought of Finn, the one member of the Resistance that Rey still could trust, and her heart panged with worry for him. Was he okay? Or was he one of the Resistance fighters just massacred?

Rey craned her head in the slightly cramped space, hoping to hear more details – any news of her friend. But the troopers had moved on, leaving Rey alone once more on this particular deck.

After carefully and quietly freeing herself from the confined space of the air vent, Rey began once again to move towards the outer rim of the ship. Quietly, she slipped through the shadows. She stealthily followed the sounds of troopers, using all of her training to make sure that she was not seen by her gracious hosts. Within mere minutes, Rey found herself looking into the hanger bay. Ships were docked in position, as the more haggard looking ones were being worked on by legions of mechanics to keep them within working order. Rey's eyes widened at the sight of it all, the gears in her mind already turning as she worked out how exactly she was going to escape this ship.

Rey ducked behind a large stack of metal cargo containers, surveying the area as she did so. Her eyes fell upon a small transport vessel. It was an older model, and rather inconspicuous. It was unmarked, showing absolutely no signs of belonging to the First Order. She had no doubt that, in that ship, she would not raise any red flags as she made her way to her destination.

If only she could _get_ to the ship without being detected.

Rey waited for what felt like hours until she could find the right time to make her escape. Troopers passed her hiding place without so much as a glance in her direction. But the hanger bay never seemed to empty. If she made her attempted escape then, she would be surrounded in seconds.

She had to divert their attention.

Rey turned from her hiding spot, slipping past a gaggle of troopers undetected. She made her way back through the hall in which she came, turning corners as quickly as possible. She ran past the grate in which she hid earlier but made note of exactly where it was. If things went the way that she planned, she would need her first hiding spot again. Rey darted and weaved through the destroyer's corridors until she found a panel in the wall just a slightly different shade of chrome. With all of her might, she pulled the panel from the wall to reveal a series of tubes and wires. Her eyes landed on the center wires, all of which would be connected to the ships main frame. Rey reached out and pulled, removing the wires from their secured spot on the wall.

Almost immediately, the lights of the destroyer dimmed and she could hear the low wail of the ships alarm. Without another thought, Rey darted from her position in front of the control panel and found herself once again kicking the air free. Just a she crawled into the confined space once again, she hear the quick moving boots of running storm troopers in her direction. Soon, they would be scouring the ship for her.

With any luck, Rey would be halfway across the star system before they even realized that she as missing.

When the halls were clear, Rey darted from the air vent and sprinted back to the hanger bay. As she approached, she could see that her plan had worked – the troopers had all but cleared out. She could easily out maneuver the remaining ones. Without any hesitation, Rey began to sprint towards her escape ship.

She was almost free.

Her pace picked up, and the ship became closer and closer as she neared it. She could almost reach out and touch the shiny metal exterior of her transport when every muscle in her body stiffened uncomfortably. She attempted to move her leg forward, pushing through the stiffness and pain. But she was frozen in place. Her eyes, the only part of her that could move, drifted around the hanger bay.

They landed on a masked figure, cloaked in black. Despite his hidden face, Rey knew that Kylo Ren was staring intently at her. _How could he have possibly known what she had done? Could he sense her?_

With a swift movement, Kylo Ren removed the mask. He looked at her, his dark hair falling over his eyes and scar that she had given him. For the first time in what felt like forever, Rey truly noticed the handsome features of the man who had haunted her dreams. Rey watched helplessly as Kylo Ren took a deliberate step towards her. Almost every instinct in her body told her to retreat, and Rey was unable to listen to her flight and fight instincts. She inhaled sharply as he spoke to her, "Since the last time you and I met, I have felt it – a connection that I cannot quite explain."

The Force bond. Luke's explanation of the connection between her and his nephew seemed like so long ago. Ages. So much had happened in the time since his explanation, it had moved from the forefront of her worries. Her former master, in his wariness of the bond the two of them shared, had never fully helped her to control it. To extinguish it like the dangerous flame that it was.

"Luke Skywalker never fully explained it to you. He taught you to fear this connection, instead of use it like the source of power that it is." He continued, his eyes searching hers, "You are disappointed in him, I can sense it."

If Rey had the ability to, she would have protested. But as it was, her adversary continued, "You do not have to deny it. I have felt that same disappointment in him, the same frustration with his lack of tutelage. But I have found the answers that I was looking for. Perhaps you will too."

As he spoke, Rey could feel her muscles relaxing. Slowly, she was able to steady herself into a more comfortable position.

"With the First Order?" Rey laughed with far more bravado then she actually felt. "I don't think so."

"Perhaps you are right." Kylo smirked, one corner of his lip tilting upward in a devious half smile, "I sense you are going down a much darker path."


	9. Aleane

**This Awful Energy**

 **Summary** : It was simple: he was shrouded in darkness, and she in light. But when she discovers who she truly is, a new legacy is thrust upon her. Can Rey cope with the truth of her own past?

 **Author's Note** : Hey all of my lovelies! Here I am with another update. This one doesn't have a whole lot of action in it, but it's super important. We get a hell of a lot of answers here.

Just as a note, a lot of the lore that's mentioned in this chapter – Marka Ragnos, the Disciples – are all based on the Knight of the Old Republic. While I did take a lot of the names and lore that will be discussed in later chapters, I also did take some creative liberties with who they are and who was involved. So, please, no pitchforks!

To all my American readers out there, have a happy Thanksgiving! To my non-American readers, have a happy old regular Thursday!

* * *

 **Chapter Eight: Aleane**

 _I sense you are going down a much darker path._ The words hung between them like an anchoring weight, tethering Rey to that very spot in the middle of the hanger bay. She was frozen once more, only this time not by the power of her enemy, but by the shock of his words. The smallest of hairs on the back of her neck stood at attention, and chills ran down her spine as she considered the implication of everything that Kylo Ren had just said to her. Over the last few days, Rey had done things that she certainly had never dreamed about before: she had used a Sith power on Luke Skywalker and she had almost killed a man.

This wasn't who Rey was.

 _Or is it?_ The thought slithered in her mind as she thought about the revelations of the last few days. She had used the same Force lightening in her childhood vision. Could that truly be who Rey was meant to be?

Rey shook the unwelcome thought out of her head.

"You do not know what you are talking about," Rey hissed as she took a step back from her opponent. She had to find a way out of this conversation, out of this destroyer once and for all. She eyed the nondescript transport vessel she had singled out as her escape pod, still contemplating if she would be able to make the escape she had been hoping for. But her captor was far too close for her to execute her plan, and the room was slowly filling up with storm troopers who had abandoned their search for an escapee.

His eyes followed hers to the transport vessel, seemingly predicting what her next move would be. The corners of his mouth twitched upward in a smirk and he cleared his throat, "You can leave if you want. I will make no moves to stop you, you have my word."

Rey was about to make a retort as to just how valuable his word actually was, but Kylo continued before she had the opportunity, "But don't you want to know _who_ you are? What you are meant to do? I can help you with that."

Her eyes moved towards the small ship; her deliverance from this madness. But she found herself hesitating. There was no way that Kylo Ren could possibly know the details of everything that she had only just discovered herself: the truth of her parentage, his own parent's heinous involvement in the crime, and her abandonment on Jakku. But there was no doubt that the master of the Knights of Ren was more powerful than her, and had more resources at his disposal. She could use his help in getting all the answers about the childhood that had been so viciously stole away from her.

But she was not evil, nor was she a member of the First Order. She could not, even peripherally, be a party to an organization that destroyed half of the galaxy. She couldn't be that selfish, could she?

Rey shook her head, turning from Kylo Ren. Without another word, she began walking towards the small shuttle that would carry her far away from this ship. From Kylo Ren. From the uncomfortable truth that was their Force bond. Her slow gait transformed to a sprint across the hanger bay. When she reached her shuttle, she looked once again at the dark knight. True to his word, he made no move to try and stop her from leaving. He merely stood in place, watching her as she prepared to leave.

Using all of her upper body strength, Rey hoisted herself into the cockpit. She was so close to freedom from the shock of the last few days, the torture she was forced to endure, and the proximity to the First Order. She could almost taste it. With a flick of the switch, Rey ignited the ion engines of the small spacecraft and they roared to life underneath her. Turning her attention towards the sensor arrays and navigation system, she put in her coordinates for her intended destination: Moraband.

It would soon be as if this few day detour from her journey to Moraband had never happened.

But what would she do when she reached the planet? As the ships navigation systems mulled through its database to chart the quickest possible course, Rey's mind set out to make a definite plan. But she was struggling to picture just what she would do after her arrival.

There was no guarantee that she would find anything that she was looking for there. In all of her visions of Moraband, it had long been abandoned by any life forms. How could going there, with no knowledge of what she needed to find, help her? She would be on a wild bantha chase with no way to find the answers that she was desperately looking for.

Rey sighed, running her fingers through her brown locks. Could she really do this on her own?

 _I can help you with that._ Kylo Ren's voice penetrated her mind, sending a chill radiating through her spine.

The ships navigation system beeped; the course for Moraband had been set. All she had to do was push the forward thrusters, and exit the destroyer, and she would be on her way. She had to act.

It was now or never.

She sighed heavily as she threw the door to the spacecraft open, and climbed out of the small ship. A feeling of defeat washed over her as she marched back to the place where she had left Kylo Ren standing. He was still there, watching her with interest from the distance. His face remained stoic, betraying neither surprise nor haughtiness as she made her way back to him. A small part of Rey had to wonder if he had always known that she would stay. It was a troubling though, if he could so easily predict her actions. But Rey pushed the uncomfortable thought from her mind; she did not want to think about that right now.

It was only when she stood in front of him, that she finally spoke, "You can help me find where I came from?"

Her words came out sharp and terse, but there was no mistaking the desperation in them. In response, Kylo nodded, "I can help you to find where you came from, and the source of your power."

He extended his gloved hand to Rey, who looked at it for a long moment. Accepting this – accepting him – would not only open up her to a world of resources that she could use, but also open herself up to an entire possibility of darkness. There was no denying it, and Rey knew the consequences well.

But Rey _needed_ to know about her past. She _needed_ to know why her beautiful mother deserved to die in such a horrid way at the hands of the Republic. She _needed_ to know why she had to grow up alone and unloved on a desert planet.

Taking a deep breath, Rey reached out to the gloved hand and accepted it.

* * *

"I would like to introduce you to someone," Kylo Ren was curt in his words, as he and Rey paused in front of an entryway on the far side of the _Retaliator._ Despite his promise to help her, she found that he remained stoic and brusque. Perhaps it was for the best; she imagined this situation would be intolerable if her enemy was actually kind to her.

Rey eyed him skeptically, naturally still wary in regards to trusting her new found ally. She did not voice her doubts, but she did not have too.

Kylo, sensing her distrust, continued in a much gentler tone with his explanation, "Someone who I believe will help you find the answers that you are looking for. We pulled Elix Magister in for questioning a while ago, and he has remained here ever since. I believe he has information that will help you."

Rey sucked in a breath before nodding at him. She watched as he punched in an access code for the door, causing it to open before them. They stepped inside a small bare room with a steel bench for a bed, much like the holding cell Rey had been locked in previously. The man – Elix Magistar, huddled into a small mass, was in the corner. Rey could hear his breathing, rapid and panicked. As she watched him for the briefest of moments, she could feeling the anxiety radiating off of him and it was causing her own heartbeat to rise slightly.

Whoever this man was, he was absolutely terrified.

Without thinking much about it, Rey followed her first instinct to rush over and help the messy heap on the floor. Kneeling so that she was at his eye level, Rey reached out to touch his trembling shoulder, "Are you alright?"

Before she received a response, she shot a look over to Kylo and hissed through gritted teeth, "This man is shaking. What did you do to him?"

She huddled closer to the pathetic man, an attempt to calm him down. But Elix still shook uncontrollably and only burrowed his face deeper into his knees. He refused to look at Rey, and seemed to be hiding from Kylo Ren.

"We were looking for information," Kylo responded, the frankness in his tone was unsettling for Rey. She shuddered as she thought just what the poor man went through in the First Order's search for information; she knew just how painful the process could be. And she had been able to resist it. She could only imagine how much worse it would have been for someone else, someone less strong. "The information he shared with me would also be of use for you. To help you."

Rey knew she should have asked just how Kylo had procured the information from this man, and admonished him for causing what would no doubt be irreparable damage to this man. She should have been the bigger person. But when she heard that this man might be able to help her, she turned back to the shaking heap on the floor. She pitied the man, but the selfish feeling of wanting answers was just too strong for her to ignore. Gently, she put her hand on Elix's back, and asked as soothingly as possible, "What do you know?"

The man said nothing.

"Please," Rey begged, "I am looking for my family – for anyone who knows about them. Can you help me?"

"You can compel him to answer you," Kylo, from the corner of the tiny cell, offered. There was a mild deviance in his voice as her made the suggestion, "You can take the information from him, if you wish to. You know that you have that power."

"I don't w _ish_ to do anything of the sort." Rey shot him an icy glare before she turned back to the virtually catatonic man at her feet. She inhaled, attempting to sound as soothing as she possibly could, "I am not going to hurt you. I just want to know what you know, I just want to see if you can help me."

But Elix, if it were even possible, only huddled into himself more and gave a halfhearted whimper as a response. He refused to even look at her.

Rey felt her insides well up at the man's cowardly actions. She moved back from him, letting him fall to her feet. Her voice rose as her exasperation with the pathetic heap of a man in front of her had reached its limit. "Goddammit, what do you know? Tell me!"

She saw, out of the corner of her eye, Kylo raise his brow in surprise at her outburst. Rey had grown frustrated – angry – at the helpless man in front of her, and Kylo could easily sense it. Perhaps he was even glad for her.

The man at her feet must have sensed her anger too, because he finally looked up at Rey for the first time. His glossed over eyes widened at the sight of her, and his mouth dropped to reveal yellow and rotted teeth that strongly reeked of Corellian brandy. "Aleane?"

Rey's brow furrowed at the man's question. She was unsure of what he could possibly mean. But he repeated the word again, "Aleane?" It rolled of his tongue gently, as if he were cherishing the opportunity to say the word one more time.

Rey looked up at Kylo Ren, hoping that he would have some kind of guidance or answers for her unspoken question. But he was staring intently at the prisoner in Rey's arms; he had no more answers than she did at the moment. Rey turned back to the raggedy man, her tone softening as she addressed him once more, "My name is Rey. I was hoping that you could help me."

For a moment, the man looked crestfallen that she was not who he thought she was. But he seemed to recover quickly. Elix looked at her, his hand reaching out slightly as if he were about to stroke her cheek, "You look so much like Aleane. You have her eyes."

"Aleane," Rey let the word roll off her tongue, hoping that it would sound familiar if it were coming out of her own mouth. But it was just as foreign to her then as it was when she had first heard the man say it. "Aleane? Is that my mother's name?"

"You have her eyes," The drunkard repeated, all byt confirming Rey's suspicions.

Rey sighed, letting out a breath she had not known she had been holding since she first heard the name Aleane. A weight that she had carried with her since she was left on Jakku, seemed to lift off of her shoulders. This was what she had been waiting for her entire life. She looked back at Elix, "Who was she? What did she do? "

"She was going to bring the correct order back to galaxy."

It was a cryptic answer, to say the least. But Rey didn't dwell too much on his response. There was only one real question that she cared about; that she had to have answered immediately. Her mind replayed the vision that she had, of the brutal murder of her mother and Rey's dark response to it. She had to know _why._

"Why did the Republic kill her?" Rey's eyes watered as she choked out the question, the vision replaying over and over again in her head. Kylo Ren's head snapped in her direction at the new revelation. His eyes seemed to soften as he looked at her, and she could feel a wash of sympathy radiating from the knight. But at the moment, Rey could not be bothered to care. She needed to know what undoubtedly noble cause was worth killing a young mother, and leaving an innocent child to a life of solitude and suffering.

"Because of you," He blinked up at her, his voice filled with regret. "You were the one with the power, the one destined to bring back the true order to the galaxy. The only one with the power to resurrect Marka Ragnos. And they feared it."

"Marka Ragnos?" Rey's brow furrowed as she heard the name. Perhaps the drunkard's words were true after all; she recognized the strange sounding name from the visions she had back on Ahch-To. She had not known what it had meant then, and she did not think then that it could have been someone important to her. In truth, she had forgotten the name until it had been spoken in front of her. Luke had never mentioned such a person to her in all of the time that she was his student. Could he have even known who this person was? If he had, would he have let Rey know that she had the power to bring him back to life? "I have no idea what you are talking about."

"Marka Ragnos was one of the Sith." Kylo Ren explained, and Rey startled when he began speaking. For a brief moment, she had forgotten that he was in the cell with her. She turned to him as he continued, "He had been one of the most powerful Sith in millennia, bringing about a golden age for them. It's been said that he could do things that no one else knew how, like creating life where there once was none and even raising the dead."

Rey inhaled sharply at his words, "And this is all true?"

Kylo Ren raised his shoulders, "Marka Ragnos lived millennia ago, there is no way to know for sure. All I can say is that these legends have all survived that time."

"It _is_ true." The man on the floor cried out. Rey turned her attention back towards Elix, "It's more than just legends and myths. The leaders of the Disciples of Ragnos had found a way to bring him back. We just needed to find the right person to do it. And that was when Aleane fell pregnant." His voice sounded wistful and sad at the mention of the memory.

 _When Aleane fell pregnant with me,_ Rey thought as she chewed the inside of her cheek. All of this was far too surreal for her to comprehend. If her mother was the member of some Sith cult, then what about her father? Who was he?

"Fell pregnant by whom?" Kylo's deep voice rang out from behind her, voicing the question that Rey had just formed in her head. Something in his voice was troubling – he seemed almost _too_ eager to find out the answer to the question. It unsettled her but Rey pushed her unease out of her mind; she had far more pressing questions that needed her attention first.

"Marka Ragnos," The man replied, his voice filled with awe. "He can create life where there was none before it."

Rey took a step back from the man on the floor, her face contorting in disgust. This was absolutely insane; there was no way that any of this information could possibly be true. But Elix Magistar continued, "Aleane became pregnant as soon as we discovered how to resurrect him, and both she and her brother Varj could sense that baby's – _your_ \- power. Only someone that strong could be the one to bring Marka Ragnos back; it was meant to be."

"This is insane," Rey shook her head in disbelief.

"When you bring him back," He continued, "You will sit has his right hand, ruling over the galaxy as father and daughter."

His words made Rey shiver uncomfortably.

"Why would I want to do such a thing?" She scoffed; the idea truly was absurd. It was true that she desperately longed for adventure her entire life, but she had no desire to rule over the whole galaxy. Especially with a Sith lord, even if people believed that the Sith lord was responsible for her very existence.

"If there was one thing in the world I ever wanted, it was Aleane." The wistful look in Elix Magistar's eyes returned, "I should have protected her from those people that hunted us. I should have saved her life, but I was a coward and I ran away. It's too late for me, there is nothing that I can do for her. But you can still do something."

Rey raised her brows, "Me? What can I do?"

"Marka Ragnos had untold power. He created life, he created you. But he can also bring back Aleane," His eyes grew wide as he thought of what might have been, what still could be. "We all had reasons for joining the Disciples, something that we wanted when Marka Ragnos would undoubtedly reward us for our loyalty to his cause. Aleane was my reason – I suspect she will be yours too."

* * *

When Rey finally left Elix Magistar in the small cell, the goose pricks on her arms were still there. It was difficult for her to wrap her mind around the drunken man's insane story. But somewhere, deep inside of her gut, she knew that he was telling the truth. He had not lied to her, she could sense that. And she was grateful for the information. She only left him after guaranteeing from Kylo Ren that Magistar would have a better cell, and she demanded more humane treatment for him. Kylo acquiesced on her demands readily, and Rey was surprised that she did not have to fighter harder for that.

Perhaps Kylo had pitied her after her discovery, and that made him more amiable to her demands.

As he walked from Elix Magistar's cell with her, he regarded her carefully. His next words surprised Rey, "I am sorry about your mother. I did not know the Republic had killed her."

Rey bristled at the comment.

"Your parents were there," Rey sighed, feeling the words pour out from her unguarded. She was unsure as to why she was telling this to _him_ of all people. But she needed to tell someone after holding it all in for so long. And he was the only one there for her in the moment, "It comes back to me, sometimes, in fragments. Your parents were with the landing party that murdered her, and they were going to do the same to me. When I was meditating, those memories came back."

"Rey, I –"

But Rey did not let him continue his thought.

"They were the ones who took away my memories," She could feel the anger pouring out of her as she walked down the corridor. She knew that Kylo could feel it too. But she didn't care to be guarded in the moment, and she made no attempt to hide her contempt. She just wanted someone to know, for someone else to share in her rage, "Luke taught your mother how to do a memory rub, and they stole my memories away from me. Leia Organa was the reason I ended up waiting on Jakku for years for _nothing_."

Kylo Ren paused his gait and turned to look at her. He grabbed her shoulders, anchoring both her and her rage down. "I did not know -."

"Your mother – your father –" Rey was shaking under Kylo's touch.

"I know what kind of people they were," He said softly. His eyes met hers, and they were filled with an unexpected understanding, "I think you have every reason to hate them just as much as I do – if not more."

 _You are right. It is okay to hate them._ His voice echoed into the deep crevices of her mind.

It was as if yet another weight had been lifted off of her shoulders as his words washed over her. She didn't realize that she needed it, but the validation of her feelings was something that soothed her. She had been told the code of the Jedi did not include emotions, only inner peace. She had been told to suppress her emotions. And she had tried to do as she was told. But that only left her feeling more alone, more volatile.

Being told that her anger was okay, understandable even, was just what she needed.

Rey found herself calming down, as she stood in the middle of the corridor with Kylo. He held on to her, and Rey felt an unexpected surge of strength well up deep inside of her at his touch. Breathing out through her nose, her rage began to subside. It did not disappear entirely, but was replaced by an eerie and powerful calm. She looked up to Kylo, and whispered softly, "Thank you."

For the briefest of moments, his lips curled up in the smallest of smiles. But just as quickly as it appeared, it vanished. Rey could not say that she was shocked; this was Kylo Ren after all. One moment of understanding did not erase their past history.

He stiffened slightly as he dropped his hands from her shoulders. "If you want to find more of the Disciples of Ragnos, to find out anything else – we have compiled a list of known survivors."

"The First Order knows of the Disciples?" Rey questioned.

"Of course," He scoffed as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "We have kept tabs on any and all organizations within the galaxy. Both active and dormant factions."

"Why?" She asked, wondering just how long he had known about the Disciples.

"The very same reason the First Order exists in the first place." He explained, and he began walking once more. "To maintain order in the galaxy. There is a whole intelligence division dedicated to finding and watching different groups or organizations. We cannot have any more resistance groups forming. Most, however, are benign and allowed to exist."

"So you know where they are?" Rey asked incredulously as she managed to keep pace with his gait. She began to feel a nervous excitement bubbling inside of her where just a few moments her undeniable rage had been.

"The Disciples have long since scattered. Our intelligence suggests that survivors have deliberately disseminated across the galaxy to remain hidden from the remnants of the New Republic," Kylo explained, "But Supreme Leader Snoke has always been curious about them and their goal. We have done our best to track the remaining ones down."

Rey bit her bottom lip, wondering if she should say anything to that. She was curious to know just why the First Order had such an intense interest in this particular faction. But before she could even open her mouth, Kylo looked at her once more, "Why? Are you considering finding them all?"

His words were not accusatory nor skeptical, but rather curious. She felt the heat of his gaze upon her, and she shifted underneath it. Rey bit her lip, unsure of how to answer his question. But before she could even consider her answer, Kylo Ren began again, "When you do find them, what will you do? Will you join them?"

Rey inhaled; if she was being perfectly honest with herself, she had not planned that far ahead. All she wanted to do was to find people who knew her mother, people who would have been her neighbors, her friends, her extended family. But Elix Magistar's words stayed with her, echoing in her mind as she considered the question.

" _We all had reasons for joining the Disciples, something that we wanted when Marka Ragnos would undoubtedly reward us for our loyalty to his cause. Aleane was my reason – I suspect she will be yours too."_

Rey sighed, looking at the man in front of her. The leader of the Knights of Ren had a hard exterior, and his stoic face betrayed no hint of emotion. But she could feel his compassion – his compassion _for her_ \- coiling around inside of him. There was some part of him that worried for her.

Rey did not know how to feel about that. On one hand, she could still so vividly picture the villain she had faced on Takodana. But it felt good to have someone worry about her. She took a deep breath, "I don't know what I am going to do when I find them. All I know is that I have to try."

* * *

 **Author's Note:** Well, there it is. I really do like this chapter, for a lot of different reasons. Maybe because it was by far the easiest one for me to write so far, I'm not sure. But, either way, I would love to know what you think about it – so drop a review!


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